Kita mesti familiar dengan sebahagian dari ayat Kursi ni kan.. tapi kita mungkin tak berapa sedar konsep langit dan bumi tu berapa besarnya. Sebenarnya Allah beritahu banyak kali dalam Quran, konsep kebesaran langit dan bumi tu. Contohnya, setahun di neraka sama dengan xxx ribu tahun di dunia, bumi/dunia ini tak signifikan, neraka pada hari akhirat akan dibawa dengan 70ribu rantai dan setiap rantai dipegang oleh 70 ribu malaikat etc (maaflah tak ingat ayat mana). Kemudian Nabi Muhammad (saw) pun ada cakap, di neraka tu jarak antara seorang dengan orang yang lain tu sama dengan xx hari (atau bulan/ tahun) perjalanan dan teduhan sebatang pohon di syurga tu menjangkaui xx hari perjalanan dengan kuda terpantas.
Hari tu ada kawan postkan video ni di fb dan saya rasa wow! Ini agak membuka minda tentang kebesaran langit dan bumi itu. Hah dan jangan lupa- the universe is expanding (in Quran and scientifically proven). So saya nak simpan video ni kat blog ni. Hari tu saya tunjuk pada Adam, dia pun excited tengok angkasa lepas yang besar sangat. Kemudian saya cakap pada dia- Allah created all this and He is Al-Akbar ie Super Duper Big. Diam je pulak dia, tak faham kot. Tak apalah, nanti dah besar sikit boleh cerita lagi.
Enjoy the video!
Dah tengok video ni terfikir pulak saya memang sangat possible di galaxy lain ada komuniti manusia lain juga. Lagipun kemungkinan besar ada sebab kalau tak ada macam mana para malaikat boleh tahu sifat-sifat manusia pada ketika Nabi Adam (as) baru nak dijadikan oleh Allah swt (Al-Baqarah , 30). Macam para malaikat dah masak benar dengan perangai manusia tu sedangkan Nabi Adam (as) belum bernyawa lagi. Wallahualam.
Kadang-kadang kita buang masa buat benda-benda tak berfaedah seperti kita tak akan pulang berjumpa dengan Pemilik Universe ni. Sebagai contoh mengemaskini Fail Meja, audit itu ini, menulis laporan maklum balas audit, update sasaran kerja tahunan...what the hell. Waktu sembahyang dah masuk pun meeting tak berhenti lagi. Adoii bencinya saya. Ini belum lagi tengok tv yang makin banyak je benda mengarut.
Kadang-kadang pula terasa masalah yang kita ada macam besar sangat sampai sesak nafas kita, sedangkan di sisi Allah itu tak ada hal untuk Dia. He can solve it anytime. Ya, Dia Pemilik Universe yang sangat besar ini.
Yang Maha Besar dan Maha Tinggi itu pun belum kita betul-betul faham / digest lagi, bagaimana pula dengan 97 nama yang lain?
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3-4 minggu lepas saya ada menulis book review Cool Mum Super Dad. Saya terrrr delete entry itu tanpa sengaja dan saya tak tahu macam mana nak retrieve dia. Huhh. Mula-mula saya stress, tapi saya fikir-fikir balik apa ke jadahnya nak stress pasal benda kecik. Sudahlah, tak kuasa nak tulis balik hahaha. Tapi for parents out there it is a good book, and for my friends/ families, I have the book so jangan malu nak pinjam.
Showing posts with label Reflection. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Reflection. Show all posts
Saturday, 8 December 2012
Thursday, 10 November 2011
Notes to 4 most amazing men :)
"Imam Abu Hanifah : A glimpse of your colourful life is an inspiration. Glad I had the chance to walk through it. Your mom- can't get my mind of her. She was the reason all those happened, wasn't it?
Imam Malik : I've already loved you before. A story of you always plays in my head. The one about people asking you to be more zuhud. Hihihi...I know I will love you more. Now reading you :). Happy.
Imam Shafiee : I have always love your poems. And my favourite is 'Let the Days'. I have visited where you were rested. I can't believe I haven't read you before. I thought of jumping straight to you, but the author tells the stories of you and your brothers in chronological order. I have to read them first. I'll get to you soon. You love knowledge more than anyone else. That's why I love you.
Imam Ahmad : Sadly, you are the least I know about. Can't wait to get to know you. Can't wait."
Thursday, 13 October 2011
I have a dream
Kata2 cikgu matematik saya dulu:
"Some people have dreams, while others wake up and realize them"
Would like to share a message from my Arabic teacher:
Work hard. Or you deserved to be left behind. (talking to myself)
Would like to share a message from my Arabic teacher:
Work hard. Or you deserved to be left behind. (talking to myself)
Sunday, 7 August 2011
Tips untuk latih anak puasa
Wardina buat video ni, saya rasa memang praktikal and full of gems..Yang penting sebelum ajar diorang puasa isu solat mesti settle dulu sebab kita taknak send the wrong message eg puasa mesti jangan tinggal tapi solat tak diberatkan..
Pastu saya suka idea yang kita mesti firstly terapkan perasaan cintakan Ramadhan, supaya bila berpuasa bukannya soal tak makan minum yg diberatkan, tapi keistimewaan Ramadhan itu sendiri, barulah kita tak lembik je masa puasa..
Adam? Hari ni dia puasa sampai pukul 2.30pm.. saya cakap congratulations kat dia :) sebab ada progress..so far sahur dia tak pernah tinggal lagi..
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Semalam on call di Unit Kecemasan...macam2 ragam orang.. sangat ramai yg tak berpuasa, entah betul sakit yg dibenarkan berbuka oleh syara' atau tidak?
Ada orang yang kencing manis gula naik tinggi.. "pakcik makan pukul berapa ni?".. "pukul 9 pagi nak.." (ehh apasalah pakcik tak puasa--- dalam hati je hehe)
Yang berpuasa pula kebanyakan keputusan ujian darah dan air kencing memang menunjukkan tanda2 dehidrasi.. mula2 saya terlupa, kenapa semua kidney functions mildly deranged ni? oooo diorang puasalah...
Nasib baik mereka menghormati waktu maghrib, unit kecemasan lengang semasa maghrib mudah untuk kami berbuka..
Ada pakcik umur 90 tahun pula yg pertama kali seumur hidupnya dtg ke hospital (tekanan darahnya naik)..kerjanya penoreh getah dan pemanjat pokok kelapa.. "jadi pakcik boleh bg tau saya rahsia umur panjang?" --saya suspek mesti gaya hidup yg sihat kerana isterinya juga masih hidup pada usia 80 lebih, dan mereka telah hidup bersama hampir 70 tahun, mempunyai 12 anak (yang 6 sudah meninggal waktu kecil- mungkin zaman jepun?)
Pakcik kata..."kita orang kampung mana tau apa2 rahsia doktorrrr..pakcik makan beras sawah kampung yang tumbuk pakai lesung tu, sayur apa2 yang boleh dipetik (mungkin maksud dia pucuk liar?) pastu ikan pun ikan tangkap kat sawah je...rahsia lain mana ada nakk" :) ..terima kasih pakcik.. saya tau kesimpulannya pakcik tak makan makanan yg diproses, semua ambil terus dari nature.. tentulah tiada bahan toksik dalam badan pakcik.
Bila makan jangan lupakan saudara2 di Afrika yang sedang hadapi kemarau panjang. *sigh* belum pernah lagi jumpa org yang mati kebuluran.. tentu lebih seksa melihatnya daripada melihat org Malaysia yg mati kerana kencing manis dan sakit jantung..
Kesian semalam budak2 tinggal dengan papanya saja...
Pastu saya suka idea yang kita mesti firstly terapkan perasaan cintakan Ramadhan, supaya bila berpuasa bukannya soal tak makan minum yg diberatkan, tapi keistimewaan Ramadhan itu sendiri, barulah kita tak lembik je masa puasa..
Adam? Hari ni dia puasa sampai pukul 2.30pm.. saya cakap congratulations kat dia :) sebab ada progress..so far sahur dia tak pernah tinggal lagi..
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Semalam on call di Unit Kecemasan...macam2 ragam orang.. sangat ramai yg tak berpuasa, entah betul sakit yg dibenarkan berbuka oleh syara' atau tidak?
Ada orang yang kencing manis gula naik tinggi.. "pakcik makan pukul berapa ni?".. "pukul 9 pagi nak.." (ehh apasalah pakcik tak puasa--- dalam hati je hehe)
Yang berpuasa pula kebanyakan keputusan ujian darah dan air kencing memang menunjukkan tanda2 dehidrasi.. mula2 saya terlupa, kenapa semua kidney functions mildly deranged ni? oooo diorang puasalah...
Nasib baik mereka menghormati waktu maghrib, unit kecemasan lengang semasa maghrib mudah untuk kami berbuka..
Ada pakcik umur 90 tahun pula yg pertama kali seumur hidupnya dtg ke hospital (tekanan darahnya naik)..kerjanya penoreh getah dan pemanjat pokok kelapa.. "jadi pakcik boleh bg tau saya rahsia umur panjang?" --saya suspek mesti gaya hidup yg sihat kerana isterinya juga masih hidup pada usia 80 lebih, dan mereka telah hidup bersama hampir 70 tahun, mempunyai 12 anak (yang 6 sudah meninggal waktu kecil- mungkin zaman jepun?)
Pakcik kata..."kita orang kampung mana tau apa2 rahsia doktorrrr..pakcik makan beras sawah kampung yang tumbuk pakai lesung tu, sayur apa2 yang boleh dipetik (mungkin maksud dia pucuk liar?) pastu ikan pun ikan tangkap kat sawah je...rahsia lain mana ada nakk" :) ..terima kasih pakcik.. saya tau kesimpulannya pakcik tak makan makanan yg diproses, semua ambil terus dari nature.. tentulah tiada bahan toksik dalam badan pakcik.
Bila makan jangan lupakan saudara2 di Afrika yang sedang hadapi kemarau panjang. *sigh* belum pernah lagi jumpa org yang mati kebuluran.. tentu lebih seksa melihatnya daripada melihat org Malaysia yg mati kerana kencing manis dan sakit jantung..
Kesian semalam budak2 tinggal dengan papanya saja...
Friday, 29 July 2011
A year here and there
I was reading My First Atlas with Ammar when he pointed out that it takes 84 years for Uranus to go round the Sun and 164 years for Neptune.
Then I realized something, that a year does not mean 365 days, but the time it takes for a planet to complete a cycle around the Sun (Earth=365 days only).
Well that explains why the Quran said a year in Hell is equivalent to ? thousand years on earth (is it 60 000 years?).
So how far is the Hell from us now? FYI Uranus is about 2.57 billion km from earth at its closest distance (the distance changes constantly because Earth and Uranus is orbiting on opposite side of the Sun- if I understood it correctly).
Which brings me to the question- How BIG is the Whole Universe really?
And Nabi Muhammad (saw) traveled all the way to Sidratul Muntaha after passing Hell and Heaven in one night.
Well, no wonder our world is not significant at all in comparison to the Realm of Allah's Kingdom.
May all of us are one of the Ulul Albab (definition of Ulul Albab is in Ali Imran 190-191). Of course, the gist here is not on finding how many km exactly, because it won't benefit us (ie increase in our faith), but to know that it is beyond our capability of measuring it is sufficient for us to take a deep breath and proclaim Allahu Akbar!
Ramadhan Kareem everyone!
Then I realized something, that a year does not mean 365 days, but the time it takes for a planet to complete a cycle around the Sun (Earth=365 days only).
Well that explains why the Quran said a year in Hell is equivalent to ? thousand years on earth (is it 60 000 years?).
So how far is the Hell from us now? FYI Uranus is about 2.57 billion km from earth at its closest distance (the distance changes constantly because Earth and Uranus is orbiting on opposite side of the Sun- if I understood it correctly).
Which brings me to the question- How BIG is the Whole Universe really?
And Nabi Muhammad (saw) traveled all the way to Sidratul Muntaha after passing Hell and Heaven in one night.
Well, no wonder our world is not significant at all in comparison to the Realm of Allah's Kingdom.
May all of us are one of the Ulul Albab (definition of Ulul Albab is in Ali Imran 190-191). Of course, the gist here is not on finding how many km exactly, because it won't benefit us (ie increase in our faith), but to know that it is beyond our capability of measuring it is sufficient for us to take a deep breath and proclaim Allahu Akbar!
Ramadhan Kareem everyone!
Saturday, 25 June 2011
Monolog garam
Dulu saya kerja macam robot. Bukan saya tak berfikir, cuma saya tak nampak kekuasaan Allah pada perkara2 kecil. Perkara2 besar (yg melibatkan hidup mati) tu nampaklah. Tapi perkara2 rutin berlalu tanpa meninggalkan kesan.
Saya meninggalkan bidang perubatan pada mulanya saya anggap ia satu setback untuk saya. Tapi Allah lebih mengetahui. Ia setback yang saya perlukan. Supaya saya tak jadi robot sampai mati. Otak konon pandai tapi tak berfikir.
Saya nak cerita pasal garam dalam badan.
Dalam badan kita ada beberapa jenis garam. Yang biasa selalu doktor akan tengok ialah sodium dan potassium. Dua2 ni penting, kalau keluar dari normal range mesti dibetulkan sebelum pesakit dibenarkan pulang. Yang saya terlepas pandang dulu ialah normal range ini sangat (10x) sempit. Kalau sodium 130-145 mmol/L, kalau potassium 3.5-5.2 mmol/L sahaja. Bayangkan kalau kita buat kek atau biskut, kalau tepung atau gula tu terlebih atau terkurang 50 gram kek tu masih jadi, kadang2 tak terjejas pun rasa/tekstur kek tu. Tapi kalau garam dalam badan ni terkeluar dari normal range yg sempit itu, badan sure haywire- otot lemah, otak confuse, rentak jantung lari. Mati.
Nak betulkan garam yang terkeluar dari normal range ni kalau tak lari jauh senang. Tapi kalau jauh bezanya, alamat tak tidurlah doktor yg on call tu. Ya, seperti yg terjadi kepada saya minggu lepas. Pakcik A sudah meracau2 sebab badan kering dan terlebih sodium. Pakcik B pula garam potassium sangat tinggi hingga setiap 4 jam perlu diberi ubat melalui salur darahnya, dan dicucuk pula untuk mengambil darahnya. Ketika itu saya pun bermonolog sendirian, pukul 1 pagi di hadapan kalkulator mengira kadar infusi air untuk pakcik A, dan sesekali meninjau monitor jantung Pakcik B.
Kita bersyukur kalau kita naik gaji, dapat PhD, dapat anak etc. Bersyukur memuji2 Allah, sujud syukur, sedekah, buat kenduri syukur. Tapi garam dalam badan kita normal kita syukur dan gembira tak setiap hari? Mana ada kan..kalau tak mesti kita dah sembahyang sampai bengkak kaki macam Nabi kita. Tu pasal ulama dulu kata (yang saya dengar dari mulut Dr Mohd Asri), syukur itu lagi tinggi maqamnya dari sabar. Ramai orang beriman boleh bersabar, tapi untuk jadi orang yg betul2 bersyukur tu bukan semua orang beriman boleh buat.
Kalau kita ditimpa musibah pun, kita rasa seperti kita tak perlu bersyukur time tu, tapi concentrate energy untuk bersabar...("masa ni Allah nak kita bersabar"). Paling2 bagus pun kita bersyukur sebab musibah tu tak jadi lebih teruk lagi. Tapi kita tak ada pulak bersyukur sebab garam dalam badan kita masih dalam normal range dan rentak jantung kita masih normal dubdab dubdab. Teringat pulak Hamka kata (yg juga saya dengar dari Dr Mohd Asri) tentang ketika kita kesedihan kehilangan sesuatu atau ditimpa musibah kita sering lupa, sebenarnya- "yang ada di badan ini pun sudah satu harapan.."
Itulah tazkirah garam untuk hari ini.
Saya meninggalkan bidang perubatan pada mulanya saya anggap ia satu setback untuk saya. Tapi Allah lebih mengetahui. Ia setback yang saya perlukan. Supaya saya tak jadi robot sampai mati. Otak konon pandai tapi tak berfikir.
Saya nak cerita pasal garam dalam badan.
Dalam badan kita ada beberapa jenis garam. Yang biasa selalu doktor akan tengok ialah sodium dan potassium. Dua2 ni penting, kalau keluar dari normal range mesti dibetulkan sebelum pesakit dibenarkan pulang. Yang saya terlepas pandang dulu ialah normal range ini sangat (10x) sempit. Kalau sodium 130-145 mmol/L, kalau potassium 3.5-5.2 mmol/L sahaja. Bayangkan kalau kita buat kek atau biskut, kalau tepung atau gula tu terlebih atau terkurang 50 gram kek tu masih jadi, kadang2 tak terjejas pun rasa/tekstur kek tu. Tapi kalau garam dalam badan ni terkeluar dari normal range yg sempit itu, badan sure haywire- otot lemah, otak confuse, rentak jantung lari. Mati.
Nak betulkan garam yang terkeluar dari normal range ni kalau tak lari jauh senang. Tapi kalau jauh bezanya, alamat tak tidurlah doktor yg on call tu. Ya, seperti yg terjadi kepada saya minggu lepas. Pakcik A sudah meracau2 sebab badan kering dan terlebih sodium. Pakcik B pula garam potassium sangat tinggi hingga setiap 4 jam perlu diberi ubat melalui salur darahnya, dan dicucuk pula untuk mengambil darahnya. Ketika itu saya pun bermonolog sendirian, pukul 1 pagi di hadapan kalkulator mengira kadar infusi air untuk pakcik A, dan sesekali meninjau monitor jantung Pakcik B.
- Kita makan sesuka hati tanpa perlu memikirkan adakah makanan itu akan menaikkan kadar sodium atau potassium kita. Sebab badan kita memang boleh kawal garam2 ini secara automatik untuk kekalkan equilibrium ini. Tapis di buah pinggang, keluar masuk sel etc. Tapi ini semua bukan automatik, kan? Allah yang kawal fungsi setiap sel untuk setiap organ untuk setiap manusia dan haiwan atas dunia ni. Adakah kita 'aware' perkara2 ini berlaku semasa ia berlaku?
- Mana ada orang yg sedar perkara2 ini berjalan dalam badan kita. Kalau sekali kita mengalami kekurangan garam badan ini mungkin baru kita akan boleh appreciate nikmat yg Allah beri ni. Tapi kita lebih bersyukur dengan apa yang kita nampak / dapat. Yang kita tak nampak? Memanglah kita tak akan memikirkannya pun. Itu pasal Allah selalu sebut dalam Al-Quran, refer kepada kita hamba2Nya ni- "kalaulah mereka mengetahui..."
- Betapa sukarnya kami para doktor dari petang cuba membetulkan garam pakcik2 ini, hingga ke tengah malam semasa saya on call dan berlanjutan ke hari2 berikutnya. Ilmu kita memang sangat limited. Perkara kecil seperti ini pun kita mahu kembalikan seperti yang Allah ciptakan ia semasa normal, satu perkara sukar. Patutkah kita jalan2 atas dunia ni seperti kita orang yg paling bagus? Patutkah kita memperdebatkan hal2 dalam blog2 kita seperti kita orang yg paling pandai ? (macam yg selalu saya buatlah kan). Memang muka tak malu kan. Kita ni lagak je lebih, tapi ilmu tak ada.
Kita bersyukur kalau kita naik gaji, dapat PhD, dapat anak etc. Bersyukur memuji2 Allah, sujud syukur, sedekah, buat kenduri syukur. Tapi garam dalam badan kita normal kita syukur dan gembira tak setiap hari? Mana ada kan..kalau tak mesti kita dah sembahyang sampai bengkak kaki macam Nabi kita. Tu pasal ulama dulu kata (yang saya dengar dari mulut Dr Mohd Asri), syukur itu lagi tinggi maqamnya dari sabar. Ramai orang beriman boleh bersabar, tapi untuk jadi orang yg betul2 bersyukur tu bukan semua orang beriman boleh buat.
Kalau kita ditimpa musibah pun, kita rasa seperti kita tak perlu bersyukur time tu, tapi concentrate energy untuk bersabar...("masa ni Allah nak kita bersabar"). Paling2 bagus pun kita bersyukur sebab musibah tu tak jadi lebih teruk lagi. Tapi kita tak ada pulak bersyukur sebab garam dalam badan kita masih dalam normal range dan rentak jantung kita masih normal dubdab dubdab. Teringat pulak Hamka kata (yg juga saya dengar dari Dr Mohd Asri) tentang ketika kita kesedihan kehilangan sesuatu atau ditimpa musibah kita sering lupa, sebenarnya- "yang ada di badan ini pun sudah satu harapan.."
Itulah tazkirah garam untuk hari ini.
Sunday, 12 June 2011
Update and some reflections
Many things happened this whole month since I last wrote.
I found that memory is a superb thing. Even though I have not been using my medical knowledge for the last 3 years, it is easily recalled, and by the end of my first week of work I felt that there is no lapse in my working years. Allah is the Greatest Designer.
By age, I am now quite senior amongst other doctors here in this hospital. Many are juniors, they just completed their housemanship. I found that they are very passionate and aggressive. Many do things, not in the best interest of the patients, but for the sake of completeness (or covering themselves in case it becomes a medicolegal case). It does take some courage to practice proper responsible / sensible medicine, rather than defensive medicine (as they call it now)- but I personally view this as inappropriate. We are all answerable to God, not lawyers.
As I have written before, arrogance (I am always right / I know better attitude) is a common trait in doctors. Being able to take others' opinions (especially from lower rank staffs) are considered a weakness. In reality, the experience of the lower ranks staffs, who has worked 10-20 years, who has seen and heard more, is very valuable. Their judgment is usually more accurate. Not the doctors' MD. But if they detect a hint of arrogance in a doctor, they will reserve their opinions, and let the doctor handle it himself. This is an advice that junior doctors should take.
Other issues. Recently I had to attend to a young teenager in labour. 17, unmarried. She is a resident in a 'Sekolah Harapan' here ( a correctional institute for pregnant single mothers). Looking at her I could not stop thinking about the baby that was thrown from the fifth floor of a flat that was featured in the news recently. I reserved my judgment. I was glad I did. Every time she has contractions, between tears she was clearly reciting the 'ayat Nabi Yunus' (Lailahailla anta, subhanaka inni kuntu minazzholimin). That was all that came out of her mouth. This is the first time I hear a mother in labour, who did not utter a word of pain, but each contraction is a reminder to her (and us who attended her labour). I hope she will become a good mother, and the child will be among the solehin. I would like to meet the teachers at the Sekolah Harapan. One day, insyaAllah.
Since started working, I have not finished any book. Sad.
Non-medical issues. We have a 4-bedroom terrace house that we rented out near Ayer Keroh Melaka. When the tenant knew that we have returned to Malaysia, the family moved out secretly, leaving us a very very dirty and damaged house, and a few months of unpaid rent. They left the keys in the postbox. We rented the house to them semi-furnished, with a nice master bedroom set, book shelf etc, but to our dismay they left the house empty, saved for some rubbish here and there. Luckily the kitchen cabinets, cooker and hood are attached to the wall, if not they might have taken those out too.
We managed to track the family (Malay and Muslim- by name only, now we know), and have made a deal with them to clear everything with us while we are all alive. I do hope they keep their promise to restore the house (because we have a strong case and evidences to charge them and bring them to justice) as we need to rent out the house quickly.
For private landlords out there, some advices from us:
1. Make sure your tenancy agreement is valid- signed, stamped and witnessed. Have all things listed in the inventory, from furniture to fans and lights. Luckily we did this.
2. Use standing orders from the bank for rental payments. We didn't.
3. Make regular inspections, say every 3 months, and repair things early. We didn't, of course.
4. Everything must be included in the tenancy agreement eg. the tenant must return the house in a rentable state, rules on putting up air conditioners, repainting the walls if scribbled etc.
5. Put a special section on terms with the neighbors. Should the neighbors complaint the landlord has the right to remove the tenant. Our neighbor suffered. We are terribly sorry for that.
This really taught me a lesson. Outward appearance really does not count (mereka memang nampak baik). And even if something is rightfully ours (hak kita), if Allah holds it from us, we won't get it. I hope we can have patience in this. And Allah will give it back to us.
I found that memory is a superb thing. Even though I have not been using my medical knowledge for the last 3 years, it is easily recalled, and by the end of my first week of work I felt that there is no lapse in my working years. Allah is the Greatest Designer.
By age, I am now quite senior amongst other doctors here in this hospital. Many are juniors, they just completed their housemanship. I found that they are very passionate and aggressive. Many do things, not in the best interest of the patients, but for the sake of completeness (or covering themselves in case it becomes a medicolegal case). It does take some courage to practice proper responsible / sensible medicine, rather than defensive medicine (as they call it now)- but I personally view this as inappropriate. We are all answerable to God, not lawyers.
As I have written before, arrogance (I am always right / I know better attitude) is a common trait in doctors. Being able to take others' opinions (especially from lower rank staffs) are considered a weakness. In reality, the experience of the lower ranks staffs, who has worked 10-20 years, who has seen and heard more, is very valuable. Their judgment is usually more accurate. Not the doctors' MD. But if they detect a hint of arrogance in a doctor, they will reserve their opinions, and let the doctor handle it himself. This is an advice that junior doctors should take.
Other issues. Recently I had to attend to a young teenager in labour. 17, unmarried. She is a resident in a 'Sekolah Harapan' here ( a correctional institute for pregnant single mothers). Looking at her I could not stop thinking about the baby that was thrown from the fifth floor of a flat that was featured in the news recently. I reserved my judgment. I was glad I did. Every time she has contractions, between tears she was clearly reciting the 'ayat Nabi Yunus' (Lailahailla anta, subhanaka inni kuntu minazzholimin). That was all that came out of her mouth. This is the first time I hear a mother in labour, who did not utter a word of pain, but each contraction is a reminder to her (and us who attended her labour). I hope she will become a good mother, and the child will be among the solehin. I would like to meet the teachers at the Sekolah Harapan. One day, insyaAllah.
Since started working, I have not finished any book. Sad.
Non-medical issues. We have a 4-bedroom terrace house that we rented out near Ayer Keroh Melaka. When the tenant knew that we have returned to Malaysia, the family moved out secretly, leaving us a very very dirty and damaged house, and a few months of unpaid rent. They left the keys in the postbox. We rented the house to them semi-furnished, with a nice master bedroom set, book shelf etc, but to our dismay they left the house empty, saved for some rubbish here and there. Luckily the kitchen cabinets, cooker and hood are attached to the wall, if not they might have taken those out too.
We managed to track the family (Malay and Muslim- by name only, now we know), and have made a deal with them to clear everything with us while we are all alive. I do hope they keep their promise to restore the house (because we have a strong case and evidences to charge them and bring them to justice) as we need to rent out the house quickly.
For private landlords out there, some advices from us:
1. Make sure your tenancy agreement is valid- signed, stamped and witnessed. Have all things listed in the inventory, from furniture to fans and lights. Luckily we did this.
2. Use standing orders from the bank for rental payments. We didn't.
3. Make regular inspections, say every 3 months, and repair things early. We didn't, of course.
4. Everything must be included in the tenancy agreement eg. the tenant must return the house in a rentable state, rules on putting up air conditioners, repainting the walls if scribbled etc.
5. Put a special section on terms with the neighbors. Should the neighbors complaint the landlord has the right to remove the tenant. Our neighbor suffered. We are terribly sorry for that.
This really taught me a lesson. Outward appearance really does not count (mereka memang nampak baik). And even if something is rightfully ours (hak kita), if Allah holds it from us, we won't get it. I hope we can have patience in this. And Allah will give it back to us.
Monday, 9 May 2011
Kami sudah pulang :)
Kami telah kembali ke Malaysia :) setelah 3 tahun setengah tak balik langsung. Kami masih menumpang di rumah ibu bapa kami, belum dapat settle down lagi. Banyak pula halangannya.
1. Masa balik ke Malaysia kami naik Airbus 380. Makk aii..besarnya, macam duduk dalam business class je (walaupun saya tak pernah merasa business class tu macam mana). Setiap kerusi kelas ekonomi tu ada handphone / laptop charger individu. Ruang kaki pun besar. Terbaikk.
2. Kami singgah 3 malam di Dubai. Dubai sangat mewah. Seorang peminta sedekah pun tak jumpa (walaupun di kawasan bandar lama mereka). Sangat berbeza dengan Kaherah. Di Dubai Mall, kompleks beli-belah terbesar di dunia, setiap kali waktu solat ada azan yang berkumandang. Dalam Mall itu sendiri ada peta siap dengan nama-nama jalan. Kalau budak hilang dalam tu memang menangis tak berlagu lah. Nanti bila-bila saya letak gambar ye. Kami duduk di Holiday Inn, yang terasa seperti hotel 4 bintang tapi sebenarnya dia dua bintang saja. Ada hotel-hotel lain yang berbintang-bintang lagi hebat. Macam manalah kat dalam hotel-hotel tu agaknya.
3. Kepanasan di Malaysia membuatkan saya lupa dengan kesejukan UK. Saya cuba fikirkan, macam mana sejuk kat UK dulu yer? (kan saya selalu komplen sejuk). Dulu sejuk di UK sampai saya depress. Sekarang panas di Malaysia sampai saya tak senang duduk. Kalau pasang air-cond masih boleh pakai baju lengan pendek. Kalau di UK dulu dah pasang heater pun masih pakai baju berlapis-lapis dan berstokin.
4. Saya merasakan rumah ibu bapa kami sangat besar. Luas ruang tamu sama dengan luas seluruh apartment kami di UK. Orang Malaysia memang beruntung ada nikmat 'space' ini.
5. Dalam masa seminggu semua kulit kering saya yang pecah-pecah dan mengelupas telah pun pulih. Di UK dalam sehari tu tiap kali lepas basuh tangan, basuh pinggan mesti nak kena letak losyen. Sekarang dah macam kulit orang muda-muda semula :)
6. Banyak taman perumahan baru yang dibina, dan semua rumah cantik-cantik belaka. Syabas yer arkitek-arkitek dan designer-designer Malaysia (sesiapa yang terlibatlah).
7. Pemandu-pemandu di Malaysia memang memandu laju, termasuklah ahli keluarga saya.
8. Orang Malaysia suka simpan barang. Bekas-bekas kuih yang tak pakai pun simpan. Baju- baju lama yang bertahun tak pakai pun simpan. Surat-surat lama pun simpan (shred saja lah dan recycle). Banyak 'clutter'. Tengok saya tahun depan macam mana. Saya harap saya boleh maintain hidup 'less clutter' macam di UK (ye lah kan rumah kecik dulu, mana-mana tak berkenaan terus je buang atau recycle).
9. Internet di Malaysia slow.
10. Malaysia memang syurga makanan. Tidak syak lagi.
11. Baru seminggu di Malaysia saya sudah membeli 2 buah buku dan menempah 2 lagi buku. OK, peringatan untuk diri saya, cukup-cukup lah tu....(untuk bulan ini hehehe).
12. Saya akan mula kerja minggu depan insyaAllah. Kalau busy tahap gaban, tak dapatlah saya menulis mengomel-ngomel lagi, sebab tentunya blog ini bukan priority saya. Nasib baik juga saya ada menulis blog ini, sebab saya dah mula terasa yang 3 tahun setengah itu seperti satu mimpi.
1. Masa balik ke Malaysia kami naik Airbus 380. Makk aii..besarnya, macam duduk dalam business class je (walaupun saya tak pernah merasa business class tu macam mana). Setiap kerusi kelas ekonomi tu ada handphone / laptop charger individu. Ruang kaki pun besar. Terbaikk.
2. Kami singgah 3 malam di Dubai. Dubai sangat mewah. Seorang peminta sedekah pun tak jumpa (walaupun di kawasan bandar lama mereka). Sangat berbeza dengan Kaherah. Di Dubai Mall, kompleks beli-belah terbesar di dunia, setiap kali waktu solat ada azan yang berkumandang. Dalam Mall itu sendiri ada peta siap dengan nama-nama jalan. Kalau budak hilang dalam tu memang menangis tak berlagu lah. Nanti bila-bila saya letak gambar ye. Kami duduk di Holiday Inn, yang terasa seperti hotel 4 bintang tapi sebenarnya dia dua bintang saja. Ada hotel-hotel lain yang berbintang-bintang lagi hebat. Macam manalah kat dalam hotel-hotel tu agaknya.
3. Kepanasan di Malaysia membuatkan saya lupa dengan kesejukan UK. Saya cuba fikirkan, macam mana sejuk kat UK dulu yer? (kan saya selalu komplen sejuk). Dulu sejuk di UK sampai saya depress. Sekarang panas di Malaysia sampai saya tak senang duduk. Kalau pasang air-cond masih boleh pakai baju lengan pendek. Kalau di UK dulu dah pasang heater pun masih pakai baju berlapis-lapis dan berstokin.
4. Saya merasakan rumah ibu bapa kami sangat besar. Luas ruang tamu sama dengan luas seluruh apartment kami di UK. Orang Malaysia memang beruntung ada nikmat 'space' ini.
5. Dalam masa seminggu semua kulit kering saya yang pecah-pecah dan mengelupas telah pun pulih. Di UK dalam sehari tu tiap kali lepas basuh tangan, basuh pinggan mesti nak kena letak losyen. Sekarang dah macam kulit orang muda-muda semula :)
6. Banyak taman perumahan baru yang dibina, dan semua rumah cantik-cantik belaka. Syabas yer arkitek-arkitek dan designer-designer Malaysia (sesiapa yang terlibatlah).
7. Pemandu-pemandu di Malaysia memang memandu laju, termasuklah ahli keluarga saya.
8. Orang Malaysia suka simpan barang. Bekas-bekas kuih yang tak pakai pun simpan. Baju- baju lama yang bertahun tak pakai pun simpan. Surat-surat lama pun simpan (shred saja lah dan recycle). Banyak 'clutter'. Tengok saya tahun depan macam mana. Saya harap saya boleh maintain hidup 'less clutter' macam di UK (ye lah kan rumah kecik dulu, mana-mana tak berkenaan terus je buang atau recycle).
9. Internet di Malaysia slow.
10. Malaysia memang syurga makanan. Tidak syak lagi.
11. Baru seminggu di Malaysia saya sudah membeli 2 buah buku dan menempah 2 lagi buku. OK, peringatan untuk diri saya, cukup-cukup lah tu....(untuk bulan ini hehehe).
12. Saya akan mula kerja minggu depan insyaAllah. Kalau busy tahap gaban, tak dapatlah saya menulis mengomel-ngomel lagi, sebab tentunya blog ini bukan priority saya. Nasib baik juga saya ada menulis blog ini, sebab saya dah mula terasa yang 3 tahun setengah itu seperti satu mimpi.
Saturday, 23 April 2011
Jejak Nabi Musa (as)- Part 3
Sesungguhnya Aku inilah Tuhanmu, maka tanggalkanlah kedua terompahmu; sesungguhnya kamu berada di lembah yang suci, Tuwa. (Surah Taha: 12)
Ini yang difirmankan Allah swt kepada Nabi Musa (as) ketika baginda berhenti rehat di kawasan Sinai dalam perjalanan kembali ke Mesir dari Madyan. Ia wahyu pertama untuk Nabi Musa (as). Signifikannya sama seperti peristiwa di Gua Hira'. Kemudian di sinilah Nabi Musa (as) diberikan mukjizat tongkat ularnya dan cahaya dari tangannya dan diperintahkan menghadap Firaun. Kali kedua Nabi Musa (as) ke sini ialah selepas berjaya selamat dari Firaun untuk bermunajat selama 40 hari dan diberikan Kitab Taurat.
Lembah Suci ini terletak di Bandar St Katherine, Sinai. Kami ke kaki Gunung Sinai pada waktu tengah malam. Pukul 1 pagi kami mulakan pendakian. Saya dan Papaboyz, Adik dan 2 ustaz. Pemandu pendaki kami, seorang remaja bernama Muhamad, Arab Badwi yang fasih berbahasa Inggeris. MasyaAllah laju dia berjalan tak mengah. Saya mula2 mendaki dengan unta hinggalah 3/4 dari seluruh perjalanan, kemudian kena panjat sendiri kerana curam dan tidak sesuai untuk unta naik.
(Budak-budak mana? Diorang tidur di hotel bersama Atuk, Wan dan Maklong. Terima kasih Atuk, Wan dan Maklong jaga hero-hero)
Kami beruntung. Malam pendakian kami adalah malam bulan mengambang dan langit cerah. Lembah Suci ini sunyi sepi tetapi 'hidup'. Gunung-ganang sekitar berwarna perak disebalik kehitaman malam. Mungkin refleksi dari cahaya bulan. Saya cuba ambil gambar tetapi hanya retina mata yang dapat merakamnya. Tidak lensa kamera. Saya harap saya tak akan lupakan imej itu.
Di kaki lembah ini terdapat St Katherine Monastery, antara biara Kristian Orthodox yang tertua di dunia.
Semasa di atas unta saya hanya memerhatikan lembah ini. Saya bawa MP3 player kerana takut kebosanan mendaki tetapi langsung tak pasang. Kerana kesunyian (ketenangan?) itu sendiri telah membunuh kebosanan yang saya takuti. Hanya derap tapak kaki unta dan sesekali arahan dari penggembala unta itu memecah kesunyian. Langit malam sangat cerah penuh bintang. Patutlah Nabi Musa (as) ke sini untuk bermunajat.
Sepanjang perjalanan terdapat beberapa kedai Pak Arab yang menjual air, dan makanan, termasuk minuman panas. Dan indomie panas :) . Pandai betul. Tapi kami khuatiri punca air dan kebersihannya.
Kami sambung mendaki. Sampai di puncak masih belum ramai orang. Di puncak Gunung Sinai ada sebuah masjid dan sebuah gereja. Di tepi masjid terdapat sebuah ruang bawah tanah yang dikatakan tempat Nabi Musa (as) duduk bermunajat. Tak tahulah betul atau tidak sebab memanglah tiada kesan apa-apa. Wallahualam. Yang penting bukan tempatnya, tetapi apa yang berlaku, betul tak?
Sampai di masjid kami berehat menunggu solat Subuh. Kami berjumpa dengan satu keluarga dari Malaysia. Seorang pakcik, isteri dan anak-anak perempuannya. Ini kali kedua pakcik itu mendaki Gunung Sinai. Solat Subuh diimami Ustaz Badrul yang membacakan Surah At-Tur. Penuh masjid, hingga ada yang menunggu di luar dan mereka terpaksa membuat jemaah kedua.
Yang beragama lain pula kedengaran mendendangkan lagu-lagu keagamaan mereka di luar.
Kemudian kami menunggu matahari terbit. Ada ramai juga peniaga di puncak ini. Bukan sahaja minuman panas, mereka juga menyewakan selimut dan tilam. Memang sangat sejuk di atas sana. Tapi tilam itu pernah dibasuh atau tidak? :P
Matahari terbit. Romantik? Oh tidak. Ramai orang yer. :)
Kemudian kami turun, bayar Mohammad, balik hotel dan pengsan :D
Ada apa lagi di Semenanjung Sinai? Kami melawat Makam Nabi Harun (as), Makam Nabi Saleh (as) dan batu pada bukit yang dikatakan Lembu Samiri.
Tak pasti lah betul ke ini lembunya atau diukir rakyat tempatan, sebab dalam Surah Taha Nabi Musa (as) berjanji untuk membakar patung itu dan menabur abunya di lautan.
Berakhirlah kami menjejaki sebahagian hidup Nabi Musa (as). Makam baginda di Baitul Muqaddis. Sekiranya ke Mesir, jangan lupa peruntukkan 3 hari di Semenanjung Sinai.
Ini yang difirmankan Allah swt kepada Nabi Musa (as) ketika baginda berhenti rehat di kawasan Sinai dalam perjalanan kembali ke Mesir dari Madyan. Ia wahyu pertama untuk Nabi Musa (as). Signifikannya sama seperti peristiwa di Gua Hira'. Kemudian di sinilah Nabi Musa (as) diberikan mukjizat tongkat ularnya dan cahaya dari tangannya dan diperintahkan menghadap Firaun. Kali kedua Nabi Musa (as) ke sini ialah selepas berjaya selamat dari Firaun untuk bermunajat selama 40 hari dan diberikan Kitab Taurat.
Lembah Suci ini terletak di Bandar St Katherine, Sinai. Kami ke kaki Gunung Sinai pada waktu tengah malam. Pukul 1 pagi kami mulakan pendakian. Saya dan Papaboyz, Adik dan 2 ustaz. Pemandu pendaki kami, seorang remaja bernama Muhamad, Arab Badwi yang fasih berbahasa Inggeris. MasyaAllah laju dia berjalan tak mengah. Saya mula2 mendaki dengan unta hinggalah 3/4 dari seluruh perjalanan, kemudian kena panjat sendiri kerana curam dan tidak sesuai untuk unta naik.
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| Muhammad dan Ustaz Badrul |
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| Papaboyz di papan tanda kaki Gunung Sinai |
(Budak-budak mana? Diorang tidur di hotel bersama Atuk, Wan dan Maklong. Terima kasih Atuk, Wan dan Maklong jaga hero-hero)
Kami beruntung. Malam pendakian kami adalah malam bulan mengambang dan langit cerah. Lembah Suci ini sunyi sepi tetapi 'hidup'. Gunung-ganang sekitar berwarna perak disebalik kehitaman malam. Mungkin refleksi dari cahaya bulan. Saya cuba ambil gambar tetapi hanya retina mata yang dapat merakamnya. Tidak lensa kamera. Saya harap saya tak akan lupakan imej itu.
Di kaki lembah ini terdapat St Katherine Monastery, antara biara Kristian Orthodox yang tertua di dunia.
 |
| St Katherine Monastery |
Semasa di atas unta saya hanya memerhatikan lembah ini. Saya bawa MP3 player kerana takut kebosanan mendaki tetapi langsung tak pasang. Kerana kesunyian (ketenangan?) itu sendiri telah membunuh kebosanan yang saya takuti. Hanya derap tapak kaki unta dan sesekali arahan dari penggembala unta itu memecah kesunyian. Langit malam sangat cerah penuh bintang. Patutlah Nabi Musa (as) ke sini untuk bermunajat.
Sepanjang perjalanan terdapat beberapa kedai Pak Arab yang menjual air, dan makanan, termasuk minuman panas. Dan indomie panas :) . Pandai betul. Tapi kami khuatiri punca air dan kebersihannya.
 |
| Salah satu kedai dalam perjalanan ke puncak. Lengkap dengan tempat istirehat. |
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| Sembang pagi |
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| Sempat baring |
Kami sambung mendaki. Sampai di puncak masih belum ramai orang. Di puncak Gunung Sinai ada sebuah masjid dan sebuah gereja. Di tepi masjid terdapat sebuah ruang bawah tanah yang dikatakan tempat Nabi Musa (as) duduk bermunajat. Tak tahulah betul atau tidak sebab memanglah tiada kesan apa-apa. Wallahualam. Yang penting bukan tempatnya, tetapi apa yang berlaku, betul tak?
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| Gereja |
 | ||
| Masjid- diambil waktu siang |
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| Kawasan yg dikatakan tempat Nabi Musa (as) bermunajat |
Sampai di masjid kami berehat menunggu solat Subuh. Kami berjumpa dengan satu keluarga dari Malaysia. Seorang pakcik, isteri dan anak-anak perempuannya. Ini kali kedua pakcik itu mendaki Gunung Sinai. Solat Subuh diimami Ustaz Badrul yang membacakan Surah At-Tur. Penuh masjid, hingga ada yang menunggu di luar dan mereka terpaksa membuat jemaah kedua.
 |
| Aktiviti memeriksa masjid |
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| Tempat imam |
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| Bertafakur? |
Yang beragama lain pula kedengaran mendendangkan lagu-lagu keagamaan mereka di luar.
Kemudian kami menunggu matahari terbit. Ada ramai juga peniaga di puncak ini. Bukan sahaja minuman panas, mereka juga menyewakan selimut dan tilam. Memang sangat sejuk di atas sana. Tapi tilam itu pernah dibasuh atau tidak? :P
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| Penjual di puncak Gunung Sinai |
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| Antara yang bersidai menunggu matahari terbit |
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| Ramai lagi |
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| Subhanallah! (what else to say) |
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| Lembah Suci disimbahi cahaya matahari |
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| Adik.. merenung masa depan? |
Kemudian kami turun, bayar Mohammad, balik hotel dan pengsan :D
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| Yang bertongkat pun ada- pilgrimage untuk mereka? |
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| Eh, sempat lagi berdating yer.... |
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| Meninggalkan bayang dan tapak kaki di Lembah Suci |
Ada apa lagi di Semenanjung Sinai? Kami melawat Makam Nabi Harun (as), Makam Nabi Saleh (as) dan batu pada bukit yang dikatakan Lembu Samiri.
 |
| "Lembu Samiri" |
Tak pasti lah betul ke ini lembunya atau diukir rakyat tempatan, sebab dalam Surah Taha Nabi Musa (as) berjanji untuk membakar patung itu dan menabur abunya di lautan.
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| Makam Nabi Harun (as) |
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| Makam Nabi Harun (as) dan gereja di sebelahnya |
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| Makam Nabi Saleh (as) |
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| Pintu masuk makam |
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| Dalam makam |
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| Kawasan perkuburan di sekitar Makam Nabi Saleh (as) |
Friday, 22 April 2011
Zeitoun
Sebab malas nak tulis banyak, saya copy ringkasan ini dari satu review di Amazon:
This is a non fiction account of Abdulrahman Zeitoun an immigrant from Syria and his wife Kathy who in 2005 owned a successful house-painting business in New Orleans. When Katrina hits Abdulrahman stays behind to watch out for his property. Eggers was not present at the disaster but has essentially ghost written this book for the Zeitoun's. And what a story it is. There are no great rants against Bush or the incompetent New Orleans authorities. Eggers doesn't need to do this since the facts as presented are the most massive indictment in their own right and speak for themselves.
Abdurrahman tinggal seorang diri untuk mempertahankan rumahnya semasa Katrina melanda (baiki lubang, alih perabot etc. Setiap hari dia berkayuh dengan sampannya membantu jiran-jiran yang terkandas dan memberi makan anjing-anjing yang ditinggalkan. Ye lah, tuan punya anjing selamatkan diri sendiri je. Pada satu hari tiba-tiba dia ditahan tanpa bicara oleh penguatkuasa yang lengkap bersenjata M16 dan bullet proof vest. Dia dipenjara di penjara maksimum sekuriti, yang tak ada beza dengan Guantanamo Bay. Tiada ahli keluarganya yang tahu dia di mana.
Siapakah orang pertama membantu Abdurrahman di penjara? Seorang paderi Kristian. Memang paderi itu berhati mulia. Apa yang dia buat boleh membahayakan dirinya, tapi dia mengoyakkan secebis kertas dari Biblenya, menulis nombor telefon isteri Abdurrahman dan memberi khabar pertama dari Abdurrahman kepada isterinya.
Amerika memang takutkan bayang-bayang sendiri. Ketika amaran taufan akan melanda, pekeliling yang dikeluarkan ialah tentang kebarangkalian ancaman pengganas. Skuad-skuad tentera diletakkan di New Orleans, malah ada yang diimport dari Israel. Bukan nasib penduduk yang didahulukan. Betullah kata Sheikh Yusuf Estes, siapa yang tak takut pada Allah, akan takut kepada makhluk ciptaan Allah.
Walaupun orang kata Abdurrahman berada di tempat salah pada masa yang salah, tapi Abdurrahman kata "Allah masukkan saya dalam penjara untuk menyelamatkan saya dari perkara yg lebih buruk". Tabik hormat. Semoga berkat Allah sentiasa bersamamu, Abdurrahman.
Gambar terbaru Abdurrahman dan isteri, Kathy Zeitoun dihadapan rumah mereka. Saya cilok dari sini.
Buku ini telah memenangi beberapa anugerah, antaranya ialah American Book Award, Dayton Literary Peace Prize, LA Times Book Award dan Northern California Book Award. Malah jualan buku disalurkan kepada The Zeitoun Foundation, yang membiayai pembangunan semula New Orleans.
Bacalah. Perangai sesetengah manusia lebih teruk dari binatang.
Saturday, 2 April 2011
A veil lifted
Can't afford to lose this article. The author just defined me.
".......feeble are those who seek and those sought"
(Al-Hajj:73)
A person who seek for something other than Allah (wealth, fame, positions, relationships, etc etc) are weak, and so are the things he sought.
If you think you don't really love this world for its wealth and materials, look again. You may be attached to something else. As for me, I'm deeply attached to outcomes, people's perception, self-control, results. Now what will happen to me if I lose one of those? I will be shattered beyond repair. How true are Allah's words. How feeble are the things I attached myself to.
JazakAllahu khair Sister Yasmin.
Why do people have to leave each other?
By Yasmin Mogahed
When I was 17 years old, I had a dream. I dreamt that I was sitting inside a masjid and a little girl walked up to ask me a question. She asked me: “Why do people have to leave each other?” The question was a personal one, but it seemed clear to me why the question was chosen for me.
I was one to get attached.
Ever since I was a child, this temperament was clear. While other children in preschool could easily recover once their parents left, I could not. My tears, once set in motion, did not stop easily. As I grew up, I learned to become attached to everything around me. From the time I was in first grade, I needed a best friend. As I got older, any fall-out with a friend shattered me. I couldn’t let go of anything. People, places, events, photographs, moments—even outcomes became objects of strong attachment. If things didn’t work out the way I wanted or imagined they should, I was devastated. And disappointment for me wasn’t an ordinary emotion. It was catastrophic. Once let down, I never fully recovered. I could never forget, and the break never mended. Like a glass vase that you place on the edge of a table, once broken, the pieces never quite fit again.
But the problem wasn’t with the vase. Or even that the vases kept breaking. The problem was that I kept putting them on the edge of tables. Through my attachments, I was dependent on my relationships to fulfill my needs. I allowed those relationships to define my happiness or my sadness, my fulfillment or my emptiness, my security, and even my self-worth. And so, like the vase placed where it will inevitably fall, through those dependencies I set myself up for disappointment. I set myself up to be broken. And that’s exactly what I found: one disappointment, one break after another.
But the people who broke me were not to blame any more than gravity can be blamed for breaking the vase. We can’t blame the laws of physics when a twig snaps because we leaned on it for support. The twig was never created to carry us.
Our weight was only meant to be carried by God. We are told in the Quran: “…whoever rejects evil and believes in God hath grasped the most trustworthy hand-hold, that never breaks. And God hears and knows all things.” (Qur’an 2: 256)
There is a crucial lesson in this verse: that there is only one handhold that never breaks. There is only one place where we can lay our dependencies. There is only one relationship that should define our self-worth and only one source from which to seek our ultimate happiness, fulfillment, and security. That place is Allah.
But this world is all about seeking those things everywhere else. Some of us seek it in our careers, some seek it in wealth, some in status. Some, like me, seek it in our relationships. In her book, Eat, Pray, Love, Elizabeth Gilbert describes her own quest for happiness. She describes moving in and out of relationships, and even traveling the globe in search of this fulfillment. She seeks that fulfillment—unsuccessfully—in her relationships, in meditation, even in food.
And that’s exactly where I spent much of my own life: seeking a way to fill my inner void. So it was no wonder that the little girl in my dream asked me this question. It was a question about loss, about disappointment. It was a question about being let down. A question about seeking something and coming back empty handed. It was about what happens when you try to dig in concrete with your bare hands: not only do you come back with nothing—you break your fingers in the process. And I learned this not by reading it, not by hearing it from a wise sage. I learned it by trying it again, and again, and again.
And so, the little girl’s question was essentially my own question…being asked to myself.
Ultimately, the question was about the nature of the dunya as a place of fleeting moments and temporary attachments. As a place where people are with you today, and leave or die tomorrow. But this reality hurts our very being because it goes against our nature. We, as humans, are made to seek, love, and strive for what is perfect and what is permanent. We are made to seek what’s eternal. We seek this because we were not made for this life. Our first and true home was Paradise: a land that is both perfect and eternal. So the yearning for that type of life is a part of our being. The problem is that we try to find that here. And so we create ageless creams and cosmetic surgery in a desperate attempt to hold on—in an attempt to mold this world into what it is not, and will never be.
And that’s why if we live in dunya with our hearts, it breaks us. That’s why this dunya hurts. It is because the definition of dunya, as something temporary and imperfect, goes against everything we are made to yearn for. Allah put a yearning in us that can only be fulfilled by what is eternal and perfect. By trying to find fulfillment in what is fleeting, we are running after a hologram…a mirage. We are digging into concrete with our bare hands. Seeking to turn what is by its very nature temporary into something eternal is like trying to extract from fire, water. You just get burned. Only when we stop putting our hopes in dunya, only when we stop trying to make the dunya into what it is not—and was never meant to be (jannah)—will this life finally stop breaking our hearts.
We must also realize that nothing happens without a purpose. Nothing. Not even broken hearts. Not even pain. That broken heart and that pain are lessons and signs for us. They are warnings that something is wrong. They are warnings that we need to make a change. Just like the pain of being burned is what warns us to remove our hand from the fire, emotional pain warns us that we need to make an internal change. That we need to detach. Pain is a form of forced detachment. Like the loved one who hurts you again and again and again, the more dunya hurts us, the more we inevitably detach from it. The more we inevitably stop loving it.
And pain is a pointer to our attachments. That which makes us cry, that which causes us most pain is where our false attachments lie. And it is those things which we are attached to as we should only be attached to Allah which become barriers on our path to God. But the pain itself is what makes the false attachment evident. The pain creates a condition in our life that we seek to change, and if there is anything about our condition that we don’t like, there is a divine formula to change it. God says: “Verily never will God change the condition of a people until they change what is within themselves.” (Qur’an, 13:11)
After years of falling into the same pattern of disappointments and heartbreak, I finally began to realize something profound. I had always thought that love of dunya meant being attached to material things. And I was not attached to material things. I was attached to people. I was attached to moments. I was attached to emotions (that's me!--hantuk kepala). So I thought that the love of dunya just did not apply to me. What I didn’t realize was that people, moments, emotions are all a part of dunya. What I didn’t realize is that all the pain I had experienced in life was due to one thing, and one thing only: love of dunya.
As soon as I began to have that realization, a veil was lifted from my eyes. I started to see what my problem was. I was expecting this life to be what it is not, and was never meant to be: perfect. And being the idealist that I am, I was struggling with every cell in my body to make it so. It had to be perfect (that's me again). And I would not stop until it was. I gave my blood, sweat, and tears to this endeavor: making the dunya into jannah. This meant expecting people around me to be perfect. Expecting my relationships to be perfect. Expecting so much from those around me and from this life. Expectations. Expectations. Expectations (ME AGAIN). And if there is one recipe for unhappiness it is that: expectations. But herein lay my fatal mistake. My mistake was not in having expectations; as humans, we should never lose hope. The problem was in *where* I was placing those expectations and that hope (that's my BIG problem). At the end of the day, my hope and expectations were not being placed in God. My hope and expectations were in people, relationships, means. Ultimately, my hope was in this dunya rather than Allah.
And so I came to realize a very deep Truth. An ayah began to cross my mind. It was an ayah I had heard before, but for the first time I realized that it was actually describing me: “Those who rest not their hope on their meeting with Us, but are pleased and satisfied with the life of the present, and those who heed not Our Signs.” (Qur’an, 10:7)
By thinking that I can have everything here, my hope was not in my meeting with God. My hope was in dunya. But what does it mean to place your hope in dunya? How can this be avoided? It means when you have friends, don’t expect your friends to fill your emptiness. When you get married, don’t expect your spouse to fulfill your every need. When you’re an activist, don’t put your hope in the results (these are all my expectations). When you’re in trouble don’t depend on yourself. Don’t depend on people. Depend on God.
Seek the help of people—but realize that it is not the people (or even your own self) that can save you. Only Allah can do these things. The people are only tools, a means used by God. But they are not the source of help, aid, or salvation of any kind. Only God is. The people cannot even create the wing of a fly (22:73). And so, even while you interact with people externally, turn your heart towards God. Face Him alone, as Prophet Ibrahim (as) said so beautifully: “For me, I have set my face, firmly and truly, towards Him Who created the heavens and the earth, and never shall I give partners to Allah.” (Qur’an, 6:79)
But how does Prophet Ibrahim (as) explain coming to that point? He explains his study of the stars, the moon, and the sun, and the fact that they were not perfect.
They set.
So he was thereby led to face Allah alone. Like prophet Ibrahim (as), we need to put our full hope, trust, and dependency on God. And God alone. And if we do that, we will learn what it means to finally find peace and stability of heart. Only then will the roller coaster that once defined our lives finally come to an end. That is because if our inner state is dependent on something that is by definition inconstant, that inner state will also be inconstant. If our inner state is dependent on something changing and temporary, that inner state will be in a constant state of instability, agitation, and unrest. This means that one moment we’re happy, but as soon as that which our happiness depended upon changes, our happiness also changes. And we become sad. We remain always swinging from one extreme to another and not realizing why.
We experience this emotional roller coaster because we can never find stability and lasting peace until our attachment and dependency is on what is stable and lasting. How can we hope to find constancy if what we hold on to is inconstant and perishing? In the statement of Abu Bakr is a deep illustration of this truth. After the Prophet Muhammad ï·º died, the people went into shock and could not handle the news. But although no one loved the Prophet ï·º like Abu Bakr, Abu Bakr understood well the only place where one’s dependency should lie. He said: “If you worshipped Muhammad, know that Muhammad is dead. But if you worshipped Allah, know that Allah never dies.”
To attain that state, don’t let your source of fulfillment be anything other than your relationship with God. Don’t let your definition of success, failure, or self-worth be anything other than your position with Him (Qur’an, 49:13). And if you do this, you become unbreakable, because your handhold is unbreakable. You become unconquerable, because your supporter can never be conquered. And you will never become empty, because your source of fulfillment is unending and never diminishes.
Looking back at the dream I had when I was 17, I wonder if that little girl was me. I wonder this because the answer I gave her was a lesson I would need to spend the next painful years of my life learning. My answer to her question of why people have to leave each other was: “because this life isn’t perfect; for if it was, what would the next be called?”
".......feeble are those who seek and those sought"
(Al-Hajj:73)
A person who seek for something other than Allah (wealth, fame, positions, relationships, etc etc) are weak, and so are the things he sought.
If you think you don't really love this world for its wealth and materials, look again. You may be attached to something else. As for me, I'm deeply attached to outcomes, people's perception, self-control, results. Now what will happen to me if I lose one of those? I will be shattered beyond repair. How true are Allah's words. How feeble are the things I attached myself to.
JazakAllahu khair Sister Yasmin.
Why do people have to leave each other?
By Yasmin Mogahed
When I was 17 years old, I had a dream. I dreamt that I was sitting inside a masjid and a little girl walked up to ask me a question. She asked me: “Why do people have to leave each other?” The question was a personal one, but it seemed clear to me why the question was chosen for me.
I was one to get attached.
Ever since I was a child, this temperament was clear. While other children in preschool could easily recover once their parents left, I could not. My tears, once set in motion, did not stop easily. As I grew up, I learned to become attached to everything around me. From the time I was in first grade, I needed a best friend. As I got older, any fall-out with a friend shattered me. I couldn’t let go of anything. People, places, events, photographs, moments—even outcomes became objects of strong attachment. If things didn’t work out the way I wanted or imagined they should, I was devastated. And disappointment for me wasn’t an ordinary emotion. It was catastrophic. Once let down, I never fully recovered. I could never forget, and the break never mended. Like a glass vase that you place on the edge of a table, once broken, the pieces never quite fit again.
But the problem wasn’t with the vase. Or even that the vases kept breaking. The problem was that I kept putting them on the edge of tables. Through my attachments, I was dependent on my relationships to fulfill my needs. I allowed those relationships to define my happiness or my sadness, my fulfillment or my emptiness, my security, and even my self-worth. And so, like the vase placed where it will inevitably fall, through those dependencies I set myself up for disappointment. I set myself up to be broken. And that’s exactly what I found: one disappointment, one break after another.
But the people who broke me were not to blame any more than gravity can be blamed for breaking the vase. We can’t blame the laws of physics when a twig snaps because we leaned on it for support. The twig was never created to carry us.
Our weight was only meant to be carried by God. We are told in the Quran: “…whoever rejects evil and believes in God hath grasped the most trustworthy hand-hold, that never breaks. And God hears and knows all things.” (Qur’an 2: 256)
There is a crucial lesson in this verse: that there is only one handhold that never breaks. There is only one place where we can lay our dependencies. There is only one relationship that should define our self-worth and only one source from which to seek our ultimate happiness, fulfillment, and security. That place is Allah.
But this world is all about seeking those things everywhere else. Some of us seek it in our careers, some seek it in wealth, some in status. Some, like me, seek it in our relationships. In her book, Eat, Pray, Love, Elizabeth Gilbert describes her own quest for happiness. She describes moving in and out of relationships, and even traveling the globe in search of this fulfillment. She seeks that fulfillment—unsuccessfully—in her relationships, in meditation, even in food.
And that’s exactly where I spent much of my own life: seeking a way to fill my inner void. So it was no wonder that the little girl in my dream asked me this question. It was a question about loss, about disappointment. It was a question about being let down. A question about seeking something and coming back empty handed. It was about what happens when you try to dig in concrete with your bare hands: not only do you come back with nothing—you break your fingers in the process. And I learned this not by reading it, not by hearing it from a wise sage. I learned it by trying it again, and again, and again.
And so, the little girl’s question was essentially my own question…being asked to myself.
Ultimately, the question was about the nature of the dunya as a place of fleeting moments and temporary attachments. As a place where people are with you today, and leave or die tomorrow. But this reality hurts our very being because it goes against our nature. We, as humans, are made to seek, love, and strive for what is perfect and what is permanent. We are made to seek what’s eternal. We seek this because we were not made for this life. Our first and true home was Paradise: a land that is both perfect and eternal. So the yearning for that type of life is a part of our being. The problem is that we try to find that here. And so we create ageless creams and cosmetic surgery in a desperate attempt to hold on—in an attempt to mold this world into what it is not, and will never be.
And that’s why if we live in dunya with our hearts, it breaks us. That’s why this dunya hurts. It is because the definition of dunya, as something temporary and imperfect, goes against everything we are made to yearn for. Allah put a yearning in us that can only be fulfilled by what is eternal and perfect. By trying to find fulfillment in what is fleeting, we are running after a hologram…a mirage. We are digging into concrete with our bare hands. Seeking to turn what is by its very nature temporary into something eternal is like trying to extract from fire, water. You just get burned. Only when we stop putting our hopes in dunya, only when we stop trying to make the dunya into what it is not—and was never meant to be (jannah)—will this life finally stop breaking our hearts.
We must also realize that nothing happens without a purpose. Nothing. Not even broken hearts. Not even pain. That broken heart and that pain are lessons and signs for us. They are warnings that something is wrong. They are warnings that we need to make a change. Just like the pain of being burned is what warns us to remove our hand from the fire, emotional pain warns us that we need to make an internal change. That we need to detach. Pain is a form of forced detachment. Like the loved one who hurts you again and again and again, the more dunya hurts us, the more we inevitably detach from it. The more we inevitably stop loving it.
And pain is a pointer to our attachments. That which makes us cry, that which causes us most pain is where our false attachments lie. And it is those things which we are attached to as we should only be attached to Allah which become barriers on our path to God. But the pain itself is what makes the false attachment evident. The pain creates a condition in our life that we seek to change, and if there is anything about our condition that we don’t like, there is a divine formula to change it. God says: “Verily never will God change the condition of a people until they change what is within themselves.” (Qur’an, 13:11)
(kalau terjumpa ayat ni di mana2, selalu yg saya faham ialah Allah tak akan mengubah keadaan sesuatu kaum hingga mereka mengubah keadaan mereka sendiri- tapi bukan begitu? bukannya mengubah keadaan mereka ie situasi, pelan tindakan etc tetapi apa yang ada dalam diri mereka)
After years of falling into the same pattern of disappointments and heartbreak, I finally began to realize something profound. I had always thought that love of dunya meant being attached to material things. And I was not attached to material things. I was attached to people. I was attached to moments. I was attached to emotions (that's me!--hantuk kepala). So I thought that the love of dunya just did not apply to me. What I didn’t realize was that people, moments, emotions are all a part of dunya. What I didn’t realize is that all the pain I had experienced in life was due to one thing, and one thing only: love of dunya.
As soon as I began to have that realization, a veil was lifted from my eyes. I started to see what my problem was. I was expecting this life to be what it is not, and was never meant to be: perfect. And being the idealist that I am, I was struggling with every cell in my body to make it so. It had to be perfect (that's me again). And I would not stop until it was. I gave my blood, sweat, and tears to this endeavor: making the dunya into jannah. This meant expecting people around me to be perfect. Expecting my relationships to be perfect. Expecting so much from those around me and from this life. Expectations. Expectations. Expectations (ME AGAIN). And if there is one recipe for unhappiness it is that: expectations. But herein lay my fatal mistake. My mistake was not in having expectations; as humans, we should never lose hope. The problem was in *where* I was placing those expectations and that hope (that's my BIG problem). At the end of the day, my hope and expectations were not being placed in God. My hope and expectations were in people, relationships, means. Ultimately, my hope was in this dunya rather than Allah.
And so I came to realize a very deep Truth. An ayah began to cross my mind. It was an ayah I had heard before, but for the first time I realized that it was actually describing me: “Those who rest not their hope on their meeting with Us, but are pleased and satisfied with the life of the present, and those who heed not Our Signs.” (Qur’an, 10:7)
By thinking that I can have everything here, my hope was not in my meeting with God. My hope was in dunya. But what does it mean to place your hope in dunya? How can this be avoided? It means when you have friends, don’t expect your friends to fill your emptiness. When you get married, don’t expect your spouse to fulfill your every need. When you’re an activist, don’t put your hope in the results (these are all my expectations). When you’re in trouble don’t depend on yourself. Don’t depend on people. Depend on God.
Seek the help of people—but realize that it is not the people (or even your own self) that can save you. Only Allah can do these things. The people are only tools, a means used by God. But they are not the source of help, aid, or salvation of any kind. Only God is. The people cannot even create the wing of a fly (22:73). And so, even while you interact with people externally, turn your heart towards God. Face Him alone, as Prophet Ibrahim (as) said so beautifully: “For me, I have set my face, firmly and truly, towards Him Who created the heavens and the earth, and never shall I give partners to Allah.” (Qur’an, 6:79)
But how does Prophet Ibrahim (as) explain coming to that point? He explains his study of the stars, the moon, and the sun, and the fact that they were not perfect.
They set.
So he was thereby led to face Allah alone. Like prophet Ibrahim (as), we need to put our full hope, trust, and dependency on God. And God alone. And if we do that, we will learn what it means to finally find peace and stability of heart. Only then will the roller coaster that once defined our lives finally come to an end. That is because if our inner state is dependent on something that is by definition inconstant, that inner state will also be inconstant. If our inner state is dependent on something changing and temporary, that inner state will be in a constant state of instability, agitation, and unrest. This means that one moment we’re happy, but as soon as that which our happiness depended upon changes, our happiness also changes. And we become sad. We remain always swinging from one extreme to another and not realizing why.
We experience this emotional roller coaster because we can never find stability and lasting peace until our attachment and dependency is on what is stable and lasting. How can we hope to find constancy if what we hold on to is inconstant and perishing? In the statement of Abu Bakr is a deep illustration of this truth. After the Prophet Muhammad ï·º died, the people went into shock and could not handle the news. But although no one loved the Prophet ï·º like Abu Bakr, Abu Bakr understood well the only place where one’s dependency should lie. He said: “If you worshipped Muhammad, know that Muhammad is dead. But if you worshipped Allah, know that Allah never dies.”
(He was the one who loved the Prophet the most, how would we feel if the person we love the most died? But how could he be the most calm? No wonder he was As-Siddiq)
To attain that state, don’t let your source of fulfillment be anything other than your relationship with God. Don’t let your definition of success, failure, or self-worth be anything other than your position with Him (Qur’an, 49:13). And if you do this, you become unbreakable, because your handhold is unbreakable. You become unconquerable, because your supporter can never be conquered. And you will never become empty, because your source of fulfillment is unending and never diminishes.
Looking back at the dream I had when I was 17, I wonder if that little girl was me. I wonder this because the answer I gave her was a lesson I would need to spend the next painful years of my life learning. My answer to her question of why people have to leave each other was: “because this life isn’t perfect; for if it was, what would the next be called?”
Saturday, 26 February 2011
The other 6-year-old boy
Dear Adam,
Today you are 6. It is time for Mama to tell you about a boy. This boy was very different from you. You have everything a 6 year-old could dream of. Mama and Papa, all four grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, good school, friends, unlimited toys, books. You never went to sleep hungry. You never woke up scared.
This boy, he lived 1400 years ago. When he was 6, your age now, his mom died. He became an orphan. His dad already died when he was still in his mummy's tummy. He was really poor. He did not have everything that you have now. He had to live with his other family members. Surely it was not the same as having your own parents.
He became a shepherd. He did not get to go to school. Nobody even taught him to read or write. There is a reason to this. Mama will tell later. But why Mama wants to tell you about this boy?
He was a very special boy. He was born with nothing. But he had something that no one else ever had as much, or would ever have as much, and that is Allah's love. You remember Allah? Mama already told you that Allah is the One who creates us, Whom we will go to when we leave this world, Whose Love and Mercy we should strive for every second of our lives.
Why you must know about this poor orphan boy? Because you must love him more than you love Mama, Papa, Ammar, Abid or yourself. And we all must love Allah like he loved Allah. It is easier said than done. He himself said (when he was older) that living in this world while striving to love Allah at the end of time (most probably our time now) would be like holding a burning coal. It is easier to let go than to endure. But to let go must never be your option. You must remember this.
Adam, his name was Muhammad. Whenever we say his name, we will say sallallahualaihiwassalam (peace be upon him). He is our Holy Prophet. Your two brothers have his name, but you don't. Because you have the name of another great Prophet whose story is more complicated. Mama will tell you when you are older, InsyaAllah.
When he was about your age now, he had to take care of sheeps. When he was a bit older, he learned to trade and became a businessman. Mama always wonder what he was like during this period of his life, the life before prophethood, because not much is said about it. What his thoughts were when he was tending the sheep, what he thought of his travels. Did he ever cried when he watched other kids with their mothers? Did he play games with other teenagers? How good was his sales skills? We know that he was an honest man. We know that he had some signs of his prophethood. But we know very little of this part of his life.
Do you wonder what he looked like? Well there are some description of the adult him. It was said that he was of a medium stature, he was neither very tall nor very short. He was handsome, of medium built and his hair was neither very curly nor very straight (but was slightly wavy). He had a wheat-coloured complexion. When he walked, he leaned forward slightly*. And he walked with a fast pace. Mama also read once that he always smile, and his smile would bring peace to one's heart, and when he shake his hand with another person, he would never be the one to let go first.
Why Allah loves him so much, Adam? Well, to start with, he never told a lie. His only priority is to please Allah and spread Allah's message. He once said that even if his favourite daughter Fatimah steals, he would cut her hand. Do Mama has the heart to cut your hand if you steal? Allah forbids we would ever be faced with that situation. Mama also knows that before he sleeps he would say Allah's name. Then he would wake up in the middle of the night to pray to Him. Some of his companions sometimes followed his night prayer. They said that when they followed the Prophet's (saw) night prayers, they would have to lean themselves onto pillars to support themselves because it was soo long. He would read AlBaqarah, Ali Imran and AnNisa' just in one rakaat. That was how long it was. Not just that, for every sentence that praise Allah, he would say tasbih. For every sentence on blessings, he would ask for priority from Allah. For every sentence on Hellfire, he would ask for Allah's forgiveness.**It was truly the prayer of one whose purpose of living was solely to worship Allah.
Can we ever meet him? In Heaven yes. But to reach him we must follow his footsteps. And the path would never be easy. The path to Heaven is full of hardship. It is the road less traveled. It is not the way of the majority.
Adam, you are 6 today. Remember this 6 year-old orphan boy. There are a lot more to tell. Not just about him, but also his wives, his loyal companions, his journeys. Mama will tell you more and more about him until he becomes your best friend. Then hopefully you will love him enough to be among his companions at our final destination.
Happy birthday Adam. May you have a blessed life, here and after.
Love,
Mama.
*Reported by Anas Bin Malik (ra)
** Reported by Abdullah Ibn Abbas (ra).
Today you are 6. It is time for Mama to tell you about a boy. This boy was very different from you. You have everything a 6 year-old could dream of. Mama and Papa, all four grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, good school, friends, unlimited toys, books. You never went to sleep hungry. You never woke up scared.
This boy, he lived 1400 years ago. When he was 6, your age now, his mom died. He became an orphan. His dad already died when he was still in his mummy's tummy. He was really poor. He did not have everything that you have now. He had to live with his other family members. Surely it was not the same as having your own parents.
He became a shepherd. He did not get to go to school. Nobody even taught him to read or write. There is a reason to this. Mama will tell later. But why Mama wants to tell you about this boy?
He was a very special boy. He was born with nothing. But he had something that no one else ever had as much, or would ever have as much, and that is Allah's love. You remember Allah? Mama already told you that Allah is the One who creates us, Whom we will go to when we leave this world, Whose Love and Mercy we should strive for every second of our lives.
Why you must know about this poor orphan boy? Because you must love him more than you love Mama, Papa, Ammar, Abid or yourself. And we all must love Allah like he loved Allah. It is easier said than done. He himself said (when he was older) that living in this world while striving to love Allah at the end of time (most probably our time now) would be like holding a burning coal. It is easier to let go than to endure. But to let go must never be your option. You must remember this.
Adam, his name was Muhammad. Whenever we say his name, we will say sallallahualaihiwassalam (peace be upon him). He is our Holy Prophet. Your two brothers have his name, but you don't. Because you have the name of another great Prophet whose story is more complicated. Mama will tell you when you are older, InsyaAllah.
When he was about your age now, he had to take care of sheeps. When he was a bit older, he learned to trade and became a businessman. Mama always wonder what he was like during this period of his life, the life before prophethood, because not much is said about it. What his thoughts were when he was tending the sheep, what he thought of his travels. Did he ever cried when he watched other kids with their mothers? Did he play games with other teenagers? How good was his sales skills? We know that he was an honest man. We know that he had some signs of his prophethood. But we know very little of this part of his life.
Do you wonder what he looked like? Well there are some description of the adult him. It was said that he was of a medium stature, he was neither very tall nor very short. He was handsome, of medium built and his hair was neither very curly nor very straight (but was slightly wavy). He had a wheat-coloured complexion. When he walked, he leaned forward slightly*. And he walked with a fast pace. Mama also read once that he always smile, and his smile would bring peace to one's heart, and when he shake his hand with another person, he would never be the one to let go first.
Why Allah loves him so much, Adam? Well, to start with, he never told a lie. His only priority is to please Allah and spread Allah's message. He once said that even if his favourite daughter Fatimah steals, he would cut her hand. Do Mama has the heart to cut your hand if you steal? Allah forbids we would ever be faced with that situation. Mama also knows that before he sleeps he would say Allah's name. Then he would wake up in the middle of the night to pray to Him. Some of his companions sometimes followed his night prayer. They said that when they followed the Prophet's (saw) night prayers, they would have to lean themselves onto pillars to support themselves because it was soo long. He would read AlBaqarah, Ali Imran and AnNisa' just in one rakaat. That was how long it was. Not just that, for every sentence that praise Allah, he would say tasbih. For every sentence on blessings, he would ask for priority from Allah. For every sentence on Hellfire, he would ask for Allah's forgiveness.**It was truly the prayer of one whose purpose of living was solely to worship Allah.
Can we ever meet him? In Heaven yes. But to reach him we must follow his footsteps. And the path would never be easy. The path to Heaven is full of hardship. It is the road less traveled. It is not the way of the majority.
Adam, you are 6 today. Remember this 6 year-old orphan boy. There are a lot more to tell. Not just about him, but also his wives, his loyal companions, his journeys. Mama will tell you more and more about him until he becomes your best friend. Then hopefully you will love him enough to be among his companions at our final destination.
Happy birthday Adam. May you have a blessed life, here and after.
Love,
Mama.
*Reported by Anas Bin Malik (ra)
** Reported by Abdullah Ibn Abbas (ra).
Saturday, 12 February 2011
The Egypt Revolution
I can't believe in my lifetime I would witness a great historical event, and I had the urge to record it in this blog. 18 days of mass protests, to bring down an arrogant tyrant. We have been following the Egypt Revolution closely, because we just returned from there, and also because our parents are still there. I feel lucky to have the opportunity to experience Egypt before the revolution, and perhaps in the future I will have the chance to go there again and appreciate the difference.
A lot can be learned from the revolution. It was powered by the youth and the professionals. It was somewhat well organized and peaceful (the protesters were peaceful). They marched together, have volunteers stood guard the entrances of Tahrir Square to prevent protesters from bringing weapons, doctors and nurses stations to care for the wounded, perform solat on the streets, respecting other religions etc. They fully utilized the mosques and the churches to organize movements, despite telephone and internet breakdown.
In retrospect, the blocking of Facebook, Twitter and later internet has probably served as a catalyst to the revolution despite the regime's opposite intention. People could not just sit and follow from FB or Twitter in the comfort of their own living rooms, they were forced to join in the streets because they could not do otherwise. How magnificent was Allah's plan. He is indeed the Best Planner.
One thing for sure, they stand firm and stand united (am putting this in present tense as it is a du'a). They persevered. I remembered thinking how long they would last. I don't know if it were Malaysian youths how long we would last.
I also remember the feeling of disbelief after watching Mubarak's last speech. He was addressing the nation as if the people were with him. He was talking as if he was actually pressured from outside, not from his own countrymen. What a deluded tyrant.
The revolution is a symbol of unity. It was not led by Ikhwanul Muslimin or other party. I cannot help but put this photo of 2 million Egyptians praying behind one Imam. Simply moving.
Here is a video by a muslimah named Asmaa Mahfouz on January 18 that helped spark the revolution. She was calling people to come to Tahrir Square with her on January 25. It was really inspiring seeing her pledge. She said to the camera, man of Egypt, if you have some dignity and manhood, come with me and protect me. Allah won't change us unless we change ourselves first (Quran, 13:11), that's His promise. It went viral after that.
A personal account here by a young Egyptian dentist who marched with his gynecologist father. How the revolution grew the man in him and demolished his wall of fear.
And here is the faces and profiles of those perished. Doctors, lawyers, university graduates..they were not peasants. They were the country's assets. May Allah bless them for standing for the oppressed.
For you who do not care, take a step back and reflect. It is not too late to read, digest and learn from the revolution. Don't carry the nonchalant attitude as if this does not matter at all. This is a lesson in hope. In human dignity. Do not despair in whatever conditions you are in. Fight your own 'inner Mubarak'. (notice how the meaning of mubarak here has changed to something really opposite to the actual meaning). Fight for our own spiritually oppressed soul. Get up for prayers (on time!). Learn the Quran. Steadfast in guarding our heart and tongue. Teach our children. I read that the word iblis is rooted from the word 'ba-la-sa' which carries the meaning of despair. The Iblis caused you to despair because he is in despair himself. Have hope in Allah's Mercy.
May Allah bless Egypt with a Musa to replace the Pharaoh. And may Allah free Masjidil Aqsa and Baitul Muqaddis. May one day we can travel there safely and pray there, and remember that's the place where our Prophet (saw) was brought to the heavens on the night of Mikraj.
A lot can be learned from the revolution. It was powered by the youth and the professionals. It was somewhat well organized and peaceful (the protesters were peaceful). They marched together, have volunteers stood guard the entrances of Tahrir Square to prevent protesters from bringing weapons, doctors and nurses stations to care for the wounded, perform solat on the streets, respecting other religions etc. They fully utilized the mosques and the churches to organize movements, despite telephone and internet breakdown.
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| Photo by Mohamed Abed, Getty Images |
One thing for sure, they stand firm and stand united (am putting this in present tense as it is a du'a). They persevered. I remembered thinking how long they would last. I don't know if it were Malaysian youths how long we would last.
I also remember the feeling of disbelief after watching Mubarak's last speech. He was addressing the nation as if the people were with him. He was talking as if he was actually pressured from outside, not from his own countrymen. What a deluded tyrant.
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| love this pic- Source |
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| Final Friday |
Here is a video by a muslimah named Asmaa Mahfouz on January 18 that helped spark the revolution. She was calling people to come to Tahrir Square with her on January 25. It was really inspiring seeing her pledge. She said to the camera, man of Egypt, if you have some dignity and manhood, come with me and protect me. Allah won't change us unless we change ourselves first (Quran, 13:11), that's His promise. It went viral after that.
A personal account here by a young Egyptian dentist who marched with his gynecologist father. How the revolution grew the man in him and demolished his wall of fear.
And here is the faces and profiles of those perished. Doctors, lawyers, university graduates..they were not peasants. They were the country's assets. May Allah bless them for standing for the oppressed.
For you who do not care, take a step back and reflect. It is not too late to read, digest and learn from the revolution. Don't carry the nonchalant attitude as if this does not matter at all. This is a lesson in hope. In human dignity. Do not despair in whatever conditions you are in. Fight your own 'inner Mubarak'. (notice how the meaning of mubarak here has changed to something really opposite to the actual meaning). Fight for our own spiritually oppressed soul. Get up for prayers (on time!). Learn the Quran. Steadfast in guarding our heart and tongue. Teach our children. I read that the word iblis is rooted from the word 'ba-la-sa' which carries the meaning of despair. The Iblis caused you to despair because he is in despair himself. Have hope in Allah's Mercy.
May Allah bless Egypt with a Musa to replace the Pharaoh. And may Allah free Masjidil Aqsa and Baitul Muqaddis. May one day we can travel there safely and pray there, and remember that's the place where our Prophet (saw) was brought to the heavens on the night of Mikraj.
Friday, 11 February 2011
Jejak Nabi Musa (as)- Part 2
Selepas seminggu di Kaherah, kami berpeluang melawat Semenanjung Sinai. Saya kata berpeluang kerana ia tiada dalam perancangan (perancangan belanjawan). Semua ayah Papaboyz tanggung :D. Kalau tidak memang tiada rezeki kami. Semasa merancang aktiviti ke Mesir saya ada mengira-ngira cukupkah kalau melencong ke Tanah Suci? Tapi rupa-rupanya rezeki kami bukan ke Tanah Suci tetapi Lembah Suci. Di manakah Lembah Suci itu?
Tak apa, kita cerita hal siangnya dulu. Dari Kaherah kami melintasi Terusan Suez dan melintas padang pasir untuk ke Taba'.
Di Taba' kami berdiri di persisiran Teluk Aqabah melihat sempadan Israel dan Jordan. Singgah sekejap sahaja. Tapi sempat juga mendapat 3 pesanan teks dalam telefon bimbit dari syarikat telekomunikasi- 'Welcome to Israel, Welcome to Jordan, Welcome to Saudi Arabia'. Meriah.
Apa signifikannya Teluk Aqabah?
Kemungkinan Teluk Aqabah adalah tempat Nabi Musa (as) membelah laut untuk menyelamatkan kaumnya dari Firaun. Tiada bukti sahih di mana lokasi sebenar kejadian hebat itu, walaupun ada teori mengatakan di sekitar Nuweiba (lihat peta) kerana penemuan artifak ribuan tahun di dasarnya (wallahualam). Teluk Aqabah juga kemungkinan tempatnya Nabi Musa (as) bertemu Nabi Khidir (as), nabi yang lebih banyak ilmu darinya.
Yang penting, bukan lokasinya, tapi iktibar kejadiannya. Kita selalu mengaitkan kejadian membelah laut itu dengan mukjizat hebat Nabi Musa (as). Tapi ketika berhadapan dengan lautan luas (kemungkinan mati) dengan tentera Firaun di belakang (juga kemungkinan mati), apakah perasaan kaum Nabi Musa (as)? Apakah pula perasaan Nabi Musa (as)? Ia dua perkara yang bertentangan.
Bani Israel : Sesungguhnya kita akan dapat ditawan!
Nabi Musa (as) : Sekali-kali tidak! Sesungguhnya Tuhanku besertaku, kelak Dia akan memberi petunjuk kepadaku.
(Dialog dari Al-Quran, 26:61-62)
Di kala bertemu jalan buntu, dikelilingi pula aura negatif dari kaumnya, Nabi Musa (as) masih teguh tawakalnya.
Mengenai pertemuan dengan Nabi Khidir (as) pula, sangat banyak hikmahnya. Baca banyak kali pun, setiap kali tentu akan terjumpa hikmah yang baru. Tetapi ia kisah yang menunjukkan macammana tinggi kita belajar pun, berapa banyak ilmu yang kita ada pun, ada orang lain yang lebih pandai dari kita, dan kita tak akan bersabar dengan sesuatu yang tidak kita ketahui.
Saat mereka didalam perahu yang ditumpangi, datanglah seekor burung lalu hinggap di hujung perahu itu. Burung itu meneguk air dengan paruhnya, lalu Nabi Khidir berkata, “Ilmuku dan ilmumu jika berbanding dengan ilmu Allah, adalah seperti air yang diteguk burung itu dari lautan yang luas ini." (Sahih Bukhari)
Dan, ilmuku dan ilmu-mu, tidak setitik pun dari ilmu kedua-dua manusia hebat itu.
p/s- Lembah Suci dalam Part 3 ok..
Tak apa, kita cerita hal siangnya dulu. Dari Kaherah kami melintasi Terusan Suez dan melintas padang pasir untuk ke Taba'.
Gambar diambil dari sini.
Di Taba' kami berdiri di persisiran Teluk Aqabah melihat sempadan Israel dan Jordan. Singgah sekejap sahaja. Tapi sempat juga mendapat 3 pesanan teks dalam telefon bimbit dari syarikat telekomunikasi- 'Welcome to Israel, Welcome to Jordan, Welcome to Saudi Arabia'. Meriah.
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| Indahnya Teluk Aqabah.. |
Apa signifikannya Teluk Aqabah?
Kemungkinan Teluk Aqabah adalah tempat Nabi Musa (as) membelah laut untuk menyelamatkan kaumnya dari Firaun. Tiada bukti sahih di mana lokasi sebenar kejadian hebat itu, walaupun ada teori mengatakan di sekitar Nuweiba (lihat peta) kerana penemuan artifak ribuan tahun di dasarnya (wallahualam). Teluk Aqabah juga kemungkinan tempatnya Nabi Musa (as) bertemu Nabi Khidir (as), nabi yang lebih banyak ilmu darinya.
Yang penting, bukan lokasinya, tapi iktibar kejadiannya. Kita selalu mengaitkan kejadian membelah laut itu dengan mukjizat hebat Nabi Musa (as). Tapi ketika berhadapan dengan lautan luas (kemungkinan mati) dengan tentera Firaun di belakang (juga kemungkinan mati), apakah perasaan kaum Nabi Musa (as)? Apakah pula perasaan Nabi Musa (as)? Ia dua perkara yang bertentangan.
Bani Israel : Sesungguhnya kita akan dapat ditawan!
Nabi Musa (as) : Sekali-kali tidak! Sesungguhnya Tuhanku besertaku, kelak Dia akan memberi petunjuk kepadaku.
(Dialog dari Al-Quran, 26:61-62)
Di kala bertemu jalan buntu, dikelilingi pula aura negatif dari kaumnya, Nabi Musa (as) masih teguh tawakalnya.
Mengenai pertemuan dengan Nabi Khidir (as) pula, sangat banyak hikmahnya. Baca banyak kali pun, setiap kali tentu akan terjumpa hikmah yang baru. Tetapi ia kisah yang menunjukkan macammana tinggi kita belajar pun, berapa banyak ilmu yang kita ada pun, ada orang lain yang lebih pandai dari kita, dan kita tak akan bersabar dengan sesuatu yang tidak kita ketahui.
Saat mereka didalam perahu yang ditumpangi, datanglah seekor burung lalu hinggap di hujung perahu itu. Burung itu meneguk air dengan paruhnya, lalu Nabi Khidir berkata, “Ilmuku dan ilmumu jika berbanding dengan ilmu Allah, adalah seperti air yang diteguk burung itu dari lautan yang luas ini." (Sahih Bukhari)
Dan, ilmuku dan ilmu-mu, tidak setitik pun dari ilmu kedua-dua manusia hebat itu.
p/s- Lembah Suci dalam Part 3 ok..
Wednesday, 9 February 2011
Bebelan hari ini
Saya baca di website Ustaz Zaharuddin (UZAR) yang dia baru bertemu dengan Sheikh Yusuf Qardawi. Kemudian dengan semangat berkobar-kobar UZAR menulis artikel yang menarik dan penting ini.
Kalau kita nak ilmuwan Islam kita dipandang tinggi, yang jadi ustaz/ustazah itu mesti dari golongan cream of the cream. Bukan sisa-sisa pelajar yang tak dapat masuk sekolah asrama penuh atau MRSM. Bukan budak malas yang tak suka pergi kelas.
Sebenarnya kan, semasa saya pergi ke Mesir, saya terperanjat adanya kempen pergi ke kuliah yang dirasmikan oleh ayah mertua saya. Saya nampak posternya. Sepanjang saya di sekolah dan di universiti tak pernah saya jumpa kempen macam ini. Semua orang tahu siapa tak pergi kelas rugi. Ini berat untuk saya tulis, tapi nampaknya pelajar agama kita di Mesir suka ponteng kelas (nak guna ayat apa yg lebih sesuai?). Saya tak pasti apa sebabnya. Tapi kalau baca artikel UZAR itu, nampaknya sistem pembelajaran di Mesir tidak tersusun. Mungkin perlu inisiatif kuat dari pelajar sendiri. Siapa nak pergi, pergi. Siapa taknak tiada paksaan. Mungkin professor2 mereka tak berapa pandai bersyarah. Tak tahulah. Tapi ada juga yang rajin. Setiap pagi lepas subuh ayah mertua saya hantar sekumpulan pelajar perempuan belajar talaqqi.
Mengenai pelajar terbaik Malaysia masuk jurusan agama ini, sebenarnya saya pun bersalah jugak. Masa Nik Nur Madihah kata dia nak melanjutkan pelajaran ke Jordan, hati saya bercakap sendiri, ya Allah ruginya, kenapa tak pergi UK atau US? Masa sekolah dulu pun, masa kelas agama Islam tak bagi perhatian sangat seperti masa kelas biologi atau fizik. Ini mindset saya. Patutlah Rasulullah (saw) cakap ilmu ini akan hilang walaupun kita ajarkan Al-Quran pada setiap generasi. Sebab yang memegangnya bukanlah orang yang paling cerdik dan bukan orang paling dahaga ilmu.
Satu perkara yang berkaitan. Melalui beberapa insiden, saya juga baru tersedar yang memang majoriti orang tak suka baca buku. Saya geram. Selama ini saya suka menganggap yang persepsi ini sebenarnya salah, tetapi saya semakin merasakan yang ia betul. Sekiranya anda tak suka baca buku, cuba tanamkan ini dalam diri anak-anak anda. Ia sukar. Tapi ia berbaloi. Sila mulakannya semasa dia masih bayi. Jangan tunggu dia bercakap baru nak sorong buku. Biar buku koyak, boleh ganti lain.
eh..sorry yer, membebel pulak hari ni.
Tapi hari ini saya nak bersetuju dengan UZAR.
Kalau kita nak ilmuwan Islam kita dipandang tinggi, yang jadi ustaz/ustazah itu mesti dari golongan cream of the cream. Bukan sisa-sisa pelajar yang tak dapat masuk sekolah asrama penuh atau MRSM. Bukan budak malas yang tak suka pergi kelas.
Sebenarnya kan, semasa saya pergi ke Mesir, saya terperanjat adanya kempen pergi ke kuliah yang dirasmikan oleh ayah mertua saya. Saya nampak posternya. Sepanjang saya di sekolah dan di universiti tak pernah saya jumpa kempen macam ini. Semua orang tahu siapa tak pergi kelas rugi. Ini berat untuk saya tulis, tapi nampaknya pelajar agama kita di Mesir suka ponteng kelas (nak guna ayat apa yg lebih sesuai?). Saya tak pasti apa sebabnya. Tapi kalau baca artikel UZAR itu, nampaknya sistem pembelajaran di Mesir tidak tersusun. Mungkin perlu inisiatif kuat dari pelajar sendiri. Siapa nak pergi, pergi. Siapa taknak tiada paksaan. Mungkin professor2 mereka tak berapa pandai bersyarah. Tak tahulah. Tapi ada juga yang rajin. Setiap pagi lepas subuh ayah mertua saya hantar sekumpulan pelajar perempuan belajar talaqqi.
Mengenai pelajar terbaik Malaysia masuk jurusan agama ini, sebenarnya saya pun bersalah jugak. Masa Nik Nur Madihah kata dia nak melanjutkan pelajaran ke Jordan, hati saya bercakap sendiri, ya Allah ruginya, kenapa tak pergi UK atau US? Masa sekolah dulu pun, masa kelas agama Islam tak bagi perhatian sangat seperti masa kelas biologi atau fizik. Ini mindset saya. Patutlah Rasulullah (saw) cakap ilmu ini akan hilang walaupun kita ajarkan Al-Quran pada setiap generasi. Sebab yang memegangnya bukanlah orang yang paling cerdik dan bukan orang paling dahaga ilmu.
Satu perkara yang berkaitan. Melalui beberapa insiden, saya juga baru tersedar yang memang majoriti orang tak suka baca buku. Saya geram. Selama ini saya suka menganggap yang persepsi ini sebenarnya salah, tetapi saya semakin merasakan yang ia betul. Sekiranya anda tak suka baca buku, cuba tanamkan ini dalam diri anak-anak anda. Ia sukar. Tapi ia berbaloi. Sila mulakannya semasa dia masih bayi. Jangan tunggu dia bercakap baru nak sorong buku. Biar buku koyak, boleh ganti lain.
eh..sorry yer, membebel pulak hari ni.
Tapi hari ini saya nak bersetuju dengan UZAR.
Friday, 4 February 2011
Today last year...
.... I received a phone call from an emergency physician in Leeds General Infirmary. He told me my younger brother was in grave danger, both his kidneys failed, his blood pressure shot up and his blood potassium nearly made his heart stopped. The rest was history.
Today I'm happy to tell all of you that his recent PET scan 5 months after his last chemotherapy has not detected any sign of tumor. :D. All praises to Allah Almighty.
Allah can take any of His blessings in a flash. When it happens, it will knock you to the ground and you will be down on your knees, sobbing and begging. But it is what your soul really needs. A reminder that we are all His mere servants.
The recent developments in Egypt, I hope, will not force our 11 thousand students to stop their studies there. Suddenly their future is uncertain. Suddenly Allah takes away this luxury.
Narrated Ibn Abbas (radi Allahu anhu) that the Messenger of Allah (sal Allahu alaihi wa sallam) said: “There are two blessings which many people lose: health and free time for doing good.” [The Book of Ar-Riqaq: Sahih Bukhari].
Since this is the time when mandarin oranges are in abundance, please make maximum use of it to boost your immunity :D . When you are holding the orange in your hands, say Alhamdulillah for this little pleasure of having a choice to kill your cancer cells now before they manifest themselves.
Today I'm happy to tell all of you that his recent PET scan 5 months after his last chemotherapy has not detected any sign of tumor. :D. All praises to Allah Almighty.
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| Ayim cycling |
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| Outing with dearest niece, Ainaa Arissa |
The recent developments in Egypt, I hope, will not force our 11 thousand students to stop their studies there. Suddenly their future is uncertain. Suddenly Allah takes away this luxury.
Narrated Ibn Abbas (radi Allahu anhu) that the Messenger of Allah (sal Allahu alaihi wa sallam) said: “There are two blessings which many people lose: health and free time for doing good.” [The Book of Ar-Riqaq: Sahih Bukhari].
Since this is the time when mandarin oranges are in abundance, please make maximum use of it to boost your immunity :D . When you are holding the orange in your hands, say Alhamdulillah for this little pleasure of having a choice to kill your cancer cells now before they manifest themselves.
Wednesday, 5 January 2011
A regret...
"All humans are dead except those who have knowledge. And all those who have knowledge are asleep, except those who do good deeds. And those who do good deeds are deceived, except those who are sincere. And those who are sincere are always in a state of worry." -Imam Ash-Shaafi'ee
Imam,
I came to your place of rest with little knowledge of you.
I stared and sighed, with a heart full of regrets of not knowing you as much as I should.
I followed you blindly.
I heard of your greatness and love of knowledge but I never made the commitment to be like you.
Under the glow of the green light, I could not feel you.
There I sent you Al Fatihah, and made a promise that when I stand in front of our Prophet's,
I would not have the same regret.
Al Fatihah. May Allah reward you with all the honors in Jannah.
Dear readers, please recommend me a book of his biography or his works that I can benefit from. Thank you.
Imam,
I came to your place of rest with little knowledge of you.
I stared and sighed, with a heart full of regrets of not knowing you as much as I should.
I followed you blindly.
I heard of your greatness and love of knowledge but I never made the commitment to be like you.
Under the glow of the green light, I could not feel you.
There I sent you Al Fatihah, and made a promise that when I stand in front of our Prophet's,
I would not have the same regret.
Al Fatihah. May Allah reward you with all the honors in Jannah.
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| Masjid Imam Shafiee, Kaherah |
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| Makam Imam Shafiee |
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| Makam Imam Shafiee |
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