Tomorrow is the start of a new year, and insyaAllah it will be an interesting year for us. We are hopeful that we can return to Malaysia in a few months time and I have many plans ahead, especially for the kids. For myself, I plan to get back to work, as my family needs me, and also to study, medical and other things, and I ask Allah to give me good, righteous teachers. But to start the year, I want to be a more humble person.
If you are a doctor, you will understand that this is not easy. If you don't have a profession yet, and you want to be a humble person, then cross medical doctor out of your list. Being one is not good for one's ego. People constantly look high up on you, even your family members ("
anak den doktor kat spital tampin tu haa")...---> ni bukan mak saya yg cakap ok...
Even in a small hospital, the doctors have their own parking spaces, their own pantry, in monthly assemblies (we are a government agency, remember) the front seats are reserved for us, the nurses and other support staffs greet us at the corridors. Whoever begin their work as a doctor with pure intentions in their hearts, will surely later have the seeds of arrogance planted. How many times do we feel that we have saved somebody while the truth is that it was never in our hands?
Indeed this arrogance and feeling of superiority is also displayed among the doctors themselves. Between consultants and junior doctors, between a physician and a surgeon ("this is my field, I know better than you") and between doctors in district hospitals and general hospitals.
Many times I have said that I want to study and become a specialist, but if becoming a specialist will result in me (or my family) being thrown into the Hellfire, then Ya Allah, please deter me from achieving it. Please be with me all the way. And if that is Your decision, please grant me sabar and redha.
The Iblis worshiped Allah longer than any of us, and has knowledge greater than any of us, but what made him The Cursed One? His arrogance that he was made from fire and Adam (alaihissalam) was only made from dirt.
Rasulullah (saw) said;
“The Heaven and Hellfire were arguing, and the Hellfire said, ‘What’s wrong with me? Only arrogant people go into me.’ The Heaven was saying, ‘What’s wrong with me? Only the humble people go into me.’”
I put an excerpt from a series of lectures by Imam Suhaib Webb on the Surah Al-Fatihah, in which he deals with the topic of arrogance. Taken from
here.
In the Qur’an Allah (swt) gave us a story in Surat al-Hujurat. Some Arabs came to the Prophet ï·º and said, “We believe, we are mu’minoon (believers).” Allah (swt) said, “The Bedouins say, “We have believed.” Say, “You have not [yet] believed; but say [instead], ‘We have submitted,’ for faith has not yet entered your hearts,” (Qur’an 49:14). Don’t give yourself names which you are not.
Look at the Qur’an. How did Allah (swt) describe the Prophet ï·º? This is beautiful. Allah (swt) told the Prophet ï·º “Say, “I am only a man like you […]”(Qur’an 18:110). Can you imagine that you are the Prophet ï·º, and you know that you are the last Prophet ï·º. You are sinless and Allah (swt) has forgiven everything that you have ever done before and after. You are the one who was given so many karamat (mercies) and mu’juzat (miracles) from Allah (swt). Imagine that you have to go to the people and say, “I’m a man like you.” You have to go to a bedouin who cannot read or write, who doesn’t know anything, and say, “I’m like you.” Imam Qurtubi explained that Allah (swt) tells the Prophet ï·º in so many places in the Qur’an to say “I am a man like you” to teach us not to give ourselves big labels. We should not say, “I am a Sheikh! A scholar! The sea of knowledge!” Look at the man who went and urinated in the masjid. The Prophet ï·º has to come to him and say, “I am a man like you.” Why did Allah (swt) say in Surat al-Jumu’ah, “It is He who has sent among the unlettered a Messenger from themselves […]” (Qur’an 62:2)? Imam Qurtubi explained that in these verses Allah (swt) wants to teach us to be humble. He wants to teach the Prophet ï·º humility and teach us also indirectly. We shouldn’t give ourselves these big labels and big titles. Just be yourself. Be simple. Be a normal person.
One time a man came into Madinah and he found some people sitting on the ground. He wasn’t Muslim and he asked, “Where is Muhammed?” The Prophet Muhammed ï·º answered, “I am Muhammed.” The man responded, “I bear witness that there is no God but Allah, and Muhammed is his Messenger.” Imagine, the Prophet ï·º was sitting on the ground, and he could not be differentiated from others. Be careful of position.
Someone asked why do I have to put the dr title in front of my name for this blog. I don't know why. It must be my ego in play. Now I want to change it. I thought I wanted to put something like 'A Woman Like You' then I realized what about the male readers? hehehehe....
So I presented my dilemma and asked the Wise Man of the House for his opinion. He said...
"
tak payah tukar, yang penting niat tu nak berlagak ke tak... (the problem is I'm quite sure there was some elements of arrogance when I chose to use this name 2 years ago)....
tak pun tukar je jadi Fat Mama Mirabelle"---[sambil menghirup mi kari tak pandang keliling]
hahahahahahaha.....(itu ler laki aku yang baik budi, jangan korang tak tau..)
**Mama Mirabelle is a mommy elephant who likes to tell stories to her baby elephant in the series 'Mama Mirabelle Home Movies'.
Back to the main topic..I must admit that this is my hardest resolution ever as it does not have a clear method and it is not measurable (by humans). The deadline is of course my death. I wouldn't even know if I succeed, until many thousand years from now. Feel free to help me with this anytime. And I ask for your forgiveness, readers, if I ever hurt you in the past because of my arrogance.
So to start 2011, I think I will just use Mamaboyz. Of course this will have to change again if we were to be blessed with girl/s.
Welcome 2011. May Allah be with us in our every steps. And every step bring us closer to Him.